It would make sense for Rocky to keep teaching me life lessons from the Bridge, since he taught me so much while he was here. I really was spoiled by him. 

Mornings haven't been too difficult so far. A bit weird to not have him at the foot of the bed when I wake up, but I've handled mornings relatively well. My theory is mornings got a bit tough at times near the end, so maybe it's more of a relief now. 

Even before he got sick, I'd go home from work at lunch every day to spend some time with him. People thought I was crazy, but I hated the idea of him spending nine hours just waiting for me to come home. It hits me at lunch time when I realize I don't have to go home now. 

And getting home from work at the end of the day has been brutal without him here to greet me. That's when it hits me the hardest. 

I did put the penny in his keepsake urn with his last favorite tennis ball and collar. It's pretty beat up. I can't even tell the year on it. 

OK, time for a good Rocky memory: 

As I've posted before, he LOVED his tennis balls. And he was very very picky about them. They had to be that greenish yellow color. I bought him a pack of orange ones once; he wouldn't touch them. At any one time, there would be three to four tennis balls around the house. But he always picked one that was the ONE he would play with. He'd take it out in the yard, roll around on it, drop it in the dirt, chew on it, etc. Like a baseball pitcher, he had to scuff it up and wear it down. When we'd play ball, we had to play with the favorite ball. If I tried to throw one of the new balls, he'd go back inside and get the favorite ball. 

He always took his favorite ball out with him in the yard. Every morning when he went out to go potty, he had to have the favorite ball. On more than one occasion, he'd forget that he left it upstairs the night before. When we'd get up in the morning, he'd run out of the room and franticly search for the favorite ball. He'd run right past the three or four fresh and clean balls. Then he'd remember he left it upstairs, fly up the stairs and get it. It always cracked me up that it had to be that one specific favorite ball. 

After a few months, the favorite ball would get worn out to the point that I had no choice but to "retire" it (aka, throw it away). He'd be upset for a day or two before designating one of the new balls as his new favorite and starting the process all over again. 

His last favorite ball was pretty worn down at the end, but I kept it. It's in his urn now while the remaining three balls are in his toy box. 

That picture is pretty spot on. The one on the left, he'd happily play with. The one on the right, not so much. 

When I finally write the blog, it will explain his name. 

Today's been another tough day. It was seven months ago he became a Tripawd. I really thought we'd get more time than that. But this disease plays so unfair, you're never truly sure exactly what you're dealing with. 

Tina,

It sounds like Manni is hanging in there. He's a fighter for sure. I think he gets that from his Mom. I'm hoping you all have many more good days left together. Sorry for not checking in. I'll definitely let you know how my session goes next week. 

Thanks Bonnie. 

Somewhere down the line, I'll have another pup (probably a little hellion to compensate for how sweet Rocky was) in my life. It will take time to heal and recover. 

I wanted to do something to honor Rocky and I felt like it was the least I could do considering how great this place has been to me. When Rocky was first diagnosed, I got a lot of help from the great people here. And now that he's gone, this is the one place where I feel like people really understand how tough this all is. 

So thank you, Tripawds. 

Today marks two weeks since Rocky left for the Bridge. 

I found another beat-up penny on my walk last night, but I'm still waiting for him to come to me in a dream to tell me he made it OK. 

Maybe I'm weird, but at 1 this morning, I went out to the spot where I found him - at 1 a.m. two weeks ago - and just sat and thought about him. I still haven't gotten used to the silence. My house really doesn't feel like home without him. Still can't believe how fast our time together flew past.