Our 8.5 year old black lab Mountie was diagnosed with osteosarcoma 2 weeks ago today.  We had been to the vet two weeks before and they thought he'd pulled his ACL in his back leg.  He went from a limp to completely lifting up his bad leg and walking on 3 legs.  When it didn't get better, we took him in for x-rays, and the diagnosis was osteosarcoma.  We struggled the last 2 weeks with what to do... all the time, Mountie experiencing more excruitating pain.  We drove over an hour to meet with a surgeon; then back a few days later to meet with the oncologist.  The decision on what to do was probably as excruitating as his pain, but because of his history with arthritis and dysplasia, we choose not to do amputation/chemo.  We weighed all the factors-- the anticipated life span post-op; the cost; and how he would adapt being 115 lbs on 3 legs and having arthritis.  Ultimately, we decided to try and manage the pain.  Within a few days, it was unbearable for him.  My husband and I took turns sleeping with him downstairs since he could no longer make it up the stairs.  We would lay with him on the floor when he cried in pain, and try and comfort him.  We were told to make the decision of when it was time based on his "quality of life."  Was he eating, did he enjoy seeing people, did he still enjoy going outside, etc.  Well he stopped eating dog food, but he would eat the ground beef and sweet potatoes or beef stew we made him.  He would still perk up when people came over.  But other than that, he was not himself.  He would cry and moan... didn't know what to do with himself and would lay and pant heavily looking at us with sad or confused eyes.  We knew after several nights of being up all night with him that it was time.  We called the vet yesterday and they said they would come to the house.  We told our two kids (age 5 & 7) that it was time to say good bye to Mountie; I was honest with them about what was going to happen next.  We told them he would be in heaven and not in pain anymore.  My 7 y.o was sad, but our 5 y.o couldn't figure out how to react/relate.  They gave him a hug and we sent them to a neighbors house.  

Right before the vet arrived, after a horrible morning of pain, Mountie perks up and starts frolicking with his bone outside.  What?!  Then the vet arrives and Mountie hobbles over to greet him.  It would have been so much easier if he was just lying down unable to get up.  But it was like he was going to leave just being Mountie.  We still knew despite a few moments of play, that it was not fair to him to keep him in this pain.  We sobbed and said goodbye as we held him.  

I do feel much more at peace now knowing he is no longer in pain.  We don't regret our decision to say goodbye rather than pursue ampu/chemo in his case.  We miss him terribly and I keep having fleeting instances where I think he will just come around the corner.    He will be forever loved. 

Melissa