Our journey with Cadence will more than likely end within the next couple of days.  Cadence has been a brave warrior in her fight, but the cancer is fighting more fiercely and starting to take over. 

The medicine the doctor gave her for the coughing has worked miracles for her.  Since we started on the medication (tussigon) there has been no coughing episodes at all.  For the past week her breathing has become labored and its getting progressively worse with each passing day.  I can hear the crackling in her lungs as she breathes.  At times, with no activity at all, Cadence will pant and pant, as if she is struggling to find her next breath.  With each struggle, my heart breaks more and more.  

There have been more bad days than good days with her health.  Friday was a good day.  She hung out with Steve and when I came home from work we BBQ'd and she hung out with us outside.  It was just like old times.  She was in good spirits and her tail was wagging.  She followed me around the house and sat outside the bathroom and waited for me while I was in the shower.  Cadence always does this, she is my sweet little protector.  But since that day, the days are getting worse. 

Cadence still has her appetite, but this morning did not have the energy to stay at her bowl and eat.  She looked at the food and walked straight back to bed.  I thought she wasn't hungry so I waited a few hours and then brought the food to her.  I hand fed her the food and she ate. This was when I realized she just didn't have the energy to stand and eat the food.   So far today, she hasn't even gone outside to use the bathroom.  Its a nice sunny day here and usually she would find her spot in the sun and just relax.  Today, she hasn't left the bedroom. 

Im torn because in my mind I think...its only one bad day.  Tomorrow may be a good day.  But the logical part of me knows that even though she may have one good day, there are sure to be several more bad days that follow.  Is it fair to her to put her through that?   Cadence doesn't seem to be in any pain, but how do we actually know that she isnt?  She is not whimpering or making any discomfort sounds.  But isn't being not able to breathe painful for her?  I know it would be for me. 

When Steve gets home from work we will make our decision.  In my heart I know it is time.  Steve's heart might be saying something else.  We need to make sure we come to the decision together.  Its hard letting go so soon, but its even harder to watch Cadence struggle each and every day.  She deserves to leave this world with dignity and not being in pain.  We have to do what is right for her and not for us.  We love our baby girl so much, and we dont want her remaining days to filled with suffering.

UPDATE:   As I was writing this I spoke to Steve and we both came to the realization that we needed to make the call to our vet.  I called him and told him what was going on.  He will be coming over tomorrow between 12-1.  He offered to come over tonight but we want to spend at least a little more time with Cadence before we have to say goodbye. 

So tonight we are going to just love on her and tell her how much she has meant to us.  Cadence has enriched our lives more than she will ever know. 

Plans have changed and we are having the vet come over tonight.  The breathing is even worse than it was a few hours ago and she is really struggling to even stand.  It would not be fair to her to keep her around one more night so we can spend another day with her.  It would be a long night of her struggling and our hearts breaking even more watching her.  Thanks for keeping us in your thoughts.  I don't know what I would have done without such a strong support system that I have had from everyone here. 

Thanks from the bottom of my heart.