Caring for a Three Legged Dog or Cat
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It has been over a week now that we set Callie free from her cancer. The first few days were filled with nothing but tears, but they have slowed down finally. She is still in my thoughts everyday though. I keep expecting to see her waiting at the door when we come home from being out, or lying in her favorite spots around the house, etc. Last night we had a thunderstorm, which she was always TERRIFIED of….while it was nice to not have her clawing on our bed or running around like a maniac, my husband and I both laid there thinking of how much we missed her instead.
Luckily, we have had plenty of distractions to help keep our minds off of her absence somewhat. Our three year old son keeps us very busy and we are expecting another one in just 2 weeks! I was so hoping Callie would hang in there to meet this new addition to the family, but it just wouldn't have been fair to her to drag it out any longer when she was obviously uncomfortable. My son does mention Callie at least once a day, asking when she'll be back, if she's better yet, or just saying how much he misses her. We've told him over and over again that she went to doggie heaven because she was so sick and she would be better there but she couldn't come home again, but I know he just doesn't completely understand that at his age. It just breaks my heart everytime he asks about her…I mentioned something the other day to him about maybe getting another dog one day, and his response was "No mommy, we can only have Callie…she's my doggie" 
I guess it will just take awhile to get use to our new "normal" without her….
On a more positive note, I received the memorial stone today that I had ordered for her grave and I was soooo pleased with how it turned out and how quickly it got here (just ordered it this past weekend!) It is a good quality stone with beautiful engraving and I would highly recommend the company I ordered from – Adirondack Stone Works. Looking forward to putting it on her gravesite in our backyard.
For me the first week or two after letting Maggie go were kind of a blur. Then the loss just rises up sometimes when you don't expect it and it slaps you in the face! All you can do is work your way through, and know that it does get better.
Have you looked at the Pet Loss Books for Children? Maybe there is something there that will help your son understand why Callie can't come home, and that she is OK where she is now. I have the Dog Heaven book by Cynthia Ryfant. Our oncologist sent it to us after Maggie passed. I don't have any children, but I liked the book. I wrote about it in Maggie's blog right after I got it.
Congratulations on the 'almost here' addition to your family!
Karen and the pugapalooza
I know just how you feel. Tomorrow it has been 3 weeks since I lost my girl Valentina. This doesn't feel like my life. My life is supposed to have her in it. I just keep waiting for it to get better. I wish I could just sleep the time away that it would take. My life was so centered around Valentina. I tried the positive route but this is getting the best of me. I am still happy and thankful for all of the time that I got with Valentina but nothing can erase this pain it seems. That is sad that your son wants Callie to come home and you know that she isn't going to. I wish Callie could have met your new baby too. Maybe someday you can get a new Dog and both of your children and you can enjoy the wonderfulness they bring to your life. So sorry for your loss. I know it is so very hard. Good luck with your new arrival! Praying for your peace and comfort.
Those first few weeks and even months are really, really tough, and I can't imagine having to explain it to a little one. That has got to be so hard! Karen's suggestion to check out the pet loss books for kids post is spot-on.
Congratulations on your new baby! I'm certain that Callie's spirit will be watching over all of you.
Tripawds Founders Jim and Rene
tripawds.com | tripawds.org | bemoredog.net | triday.pet
It's hard right after you lose your special fur baby. We are coming up on it being 6 months since Chili Dawg passed, and I still look for him every day. When I let Finchy in from the back yard, some days I have to stop myself from calling for Chili Dawg as well. My son is a little older then yours- he's 4, but he likes to draw pictures when he's missing Chili Dawg. He still tells me about once a week now that he misses him, and when he prays at night he asks Jesus to take good care of him for us. My daughter is a little younger- she's 2, and I don't know if she quite understands, but she points to his picture and will look for him. It will get easier for your son as time goes on. Kids are resilient, but it's sad that they have to learn about death this young. On a different note, congrats on your soon to arrive new baby! That will be an exciting time for you guys!
Jenna & Spirit Chili Dawg
Diagnosed with OSA: 5/2/2011 Ampuversary: 5/11/2011 OSA returned in hip: 8/26/2011
Chili Dawg crossed the Rainbow Bridge on 8/30/2011 & is now pain free. He was my heart dog, and I miss him every day.
My heart goes out to your family. I still miss our two boys that we have lost over the years. It is so very hard to get used to not having our babies around. My thoughts are with you.
Lisa
Zeus was a Husky mix diagnosed with Osteosarcoma at age 11. A visible lung met and suspicious spot on his liver meant a poor prognosis-six weeks was our vet's best guess. We decided to fight for our boy and his right front leg was amputated on 12/1/11. We did six rounds of chemo, changed his diet and spoiled him completely rotten. We were blessed with 10 great months after diagnosis. Against the odds, the lung met remained a single met and grew very little over those months. A wonderful furbaby with the most gentle spirit, he fought with a strength that we never imagined he possessed. We have no regrets...
http://zeuspod......pawds.com/
It's tough -- after such an intensive time where your every waking thought is consumed with their care and comfort, life does seem pretty empty when they're gone. But it does get easier with time. I try to stay focused on how much extra quality time I had with Rio rather than dwelling on the fact that she's gone. That helps most of the time.
I find it's best not ignore how you're feeling. If you take the time to feel the sadness (not to the point of wallowing, but be honest with how you feel about the loss), I think it goes away a little sooner. If you try to push it away, then the grief will sneak up and wallop you when you least expect it.
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~ ~ Rio ~ ~ |
Your post reminded me of a photo we took several years ago of our beautiful Sammy lying under the trees at the back edge of our yard — atop the grave of our previous golden, Jack. It was almost like he was spending time with the brother he never knew. And, it showed clearly how life moves on and changes. Time heals, and we gain perspective. That doesn't mean however, than we forget our beloved furbabies. They stayed firmly lodged in the recesses of our aching hearts.
— Beth and Spirit Smilin' Sammy
Smilin' Sammy, March 16, 2004 – Dec. 5, 2011
Golden retriever, diagnosed with osteosarcoma in September 2010 — right front leg amputated November 2010. He fought valiantly to stay with us; but a second diagnosis of osteosarcoma, this time in his left front leg, was more than our golden warrior could overcome. He loved his pack — and everyone else he met.
We loved him even more.
Thanks for the pennies, Sammy. They helped.
The first couple of weeks are so hard. It does start to get easier, but it takes time and you have to just get through it as best you can.
I also love that "Dog Heaven" book that Karen mentioned. My sister gave it to me when we lost our 12 yr old beagle, Bailey. (I got it out again when we lost Abby, and noticed the only dog name noted in the book - painted on a dog bowl - is Abbey. Awwww.)
Hang in there. We definitely know what you are going through. (Keep us posted on the new baby! Good luck!)
Jackie, Angel Abby's mom
Abby: Aug 1, 2009 – Jan 10, 2012. Our beautiful rescue pup lived LARGE with osteosarcoma for 15 months – half her way-too-short life. I think our "halflistic" approach (mixing traditional meds + supplements) helped her thrive. (PM me for details. I'm happy to help.) She had lung mets for over a year. They took her from us in the end, but they cannot take her spirit! She will live forever in our hearts. She loved the beach and giving kisses and going to In-N-Out for a Flying Dutchman. Tripawds blog, and a more detailed blog here. Please also check out my novel, What the Dog Ate. Now also in paperback! Purchase it at Amazon via Tripawds and help support Tripawds!
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