We are thinking of you today Bonnie and Polly!  That necklace is just beautiful.  I can't imagine how hard these milestone dates are after your puppy has passed, but I hope you know she is looking down on you smiling and you have a whole family here giving you virtual hugs.

xoxo,

Erica

Bonnie, I too am sorry you are feeling so sad. Like I said in an earlier post, I have not yet gotten to an anniversary. I know they are coming. I was relieved that we had not planned to go to the Quarter Horse Congress this year. We usually always go the 2 nd week in Oct. I really don't think I could have done it this year. We always took the boys with us. My last memory of being there was TY dragging my butt out of the camper ( literally ) and wanting to go look at all the horses . I get what you are saying about what you would do next time. I am unsure. Polly looks so regal sitting on her porch. I am a Lab girl too. Love them! Your necklace is so special, I really like it! I liken ow you have Polly right next to your heart . Thinking of you! Love from, Lori and Ty I got back on to fix a typo and Polly's banner was there.

Bonnie, hugs and love to you.  You have mirrored my thoughts and feelings perfectly.  I sometimes feel like a freak for being so emotional and still filled with heartache after 6 months without my sweetpea, Libby. Nothing has been the same and there is such a void without her. You're right, we will get there one day but that one day doesn't seem too near.

Your necklaces is beautiful. It's such a lovely tribute to all you hold dear.  Hang in there.

Love and hugs,

Amy & Spirit Libby

Dear Bonnie,

Sorry that you are going through this blue moment, and missing Polly in her one-year ampuversary.  

I agree that every case is a case.  My experiences have been very different over these years.  Johnnie is my third Golden Retriever, and my third experience with the "ugly C".  

Emotionally, I reacted more with one of my golden girls than with the other, the second case.  First, because Ximena was younger, and she had no symptoms before she had an enlarged tummy and panting, and ended up in emergency surgery for a ruptured spleen.  After surgery we had the diagnosis of hemangiosarcoma.   It was a difficult recovery and she had six weeks survival time post-op.  She was a wonderful dog, my great companion, she kept me company for months and months sleeping under my desk while I wrote my dissertation.  Another important emotional trigger with Ximena: I had lost my mom to lung cancer less than a year before the dog was diagnosed, so I was still recovering from one loss, and thought it wasn't fair to to through another loss in such a short period of time.  Had some bad months, must say.  Not only me - Saskia also mourned Ximena.  She was quite depressed, with a lot of apathy, and this was one of the reasons that Johnnie came to be part of our family - and it was wonderful for Saskia.  Johnnie was three months old, and she raised him, taught him how to be a dog, it was great to see them together - the older lady and the young pup.  When Saskia stopped eating and was diagnosed with multiple breast tumours, she was already 10 years old. 

The onco told me that in both cases, because the hemangiosarcomas would cause them to become anaemic, but they would have no pain.  This is exactly what happened.  They took no pain medication, and just became very weak, but were still standing up to go potty.  Ximena, at age 7, and Saskia, almost age 11, walked themselves across the Rainbow Bridge, in their sleep.  I didn't have to make any decision.  

With Johnnie, osteosarcoma,  it was a totally different situation because he was in pain when he was diagnosed at age five.  We decided to amputate - first big decision.  We decided to try chemo - second big decision.  It is still early to know what will happen, but today we are almost five months post-op and having the 6th round of chemo next Tuesday.  Today I took him for a walk and we had a good run on the way back home, almost two blocks and with the last 100 meters uphill.  This dog, last October, could barely walk.  He was in pain.  He was unhappy.  Now, he hops very fast on three legs and is pain-free.  I could never imagine that he would be running again.  We don't know how his situation will evolve, but up to now it's been worth it because he is having quality survival time, something poor Ximena didn't have.   We are enjoying one day after the other, and, most important: he is happy, living a normal dog life, enjoying his walks, barking at strangers who go by the house, chasing cats from the yard.  

Long post to say we all understand how you feel.  Looking back, I do regret that Ximena had to go through a painful surgery and didnt' have quality of life post-op.  It is, however, easy to be a "Monday Morning Quarterback"  (in Brazil, we say "engineer of a finished building").  When times come to make a decision, without a crystal ball to know what lies ahead, we have to trust that our decisions are the best for our pups, and be at peace with the decision.

hugs,

Daniela