Caring for a Three Legged Dog or Cat
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Hi Tripawd Family,
When I reached out Saturday night, I was praying things would turn around on Sunday with a day of rest.
We spent the day relaxing with Theodore because we could barely get him to do anything. If he stood up he immediately would have significant trouble breathing. His eyes were glazed over and at this point he hadn't eaten in about 5 days.
We laid in bed with our boy Sunday night and gave him so much love, I guess I felt like we were close. I kissed my favorite tufts of fur, I kissed his snaggle tooth, and I held his precious paw and tried to remember his smell.
After about an hour of love Theo sat up and coughed up a huge amount of blood, from then on the respiratory distress didn't stop, he was gargling with labored breathing. We rushed him back to the ER, on the way I held him and told him my favorite stories of him and all the amazing times he had in his life. Once at the ER he was immediately placed on oxygen. The option they gave was to put him under and wash his lungs, keep him for two days, and "hopefully" find out whether it was pneumonia or lung mets, that was assuming he stabilized and survived them flushing water into his lungs. And we are also assuming it ended up being pneumonia and that he could even survive that with such a weakened immune system. The vet ended up saying she really didn't think pneumonia would produce such significant blood. And given the large growth he now had in his groin, and the fact that he couldn't go to the bathroom, and he had zero interest in me and Evan or food, or playing ball we felt like it was time to send him to the Rainbow Bridge to play ball with his friends again.
I am utterly, sickly heart broken. I don't know why we never got a chance to give this horrible disease a real fight, maybe Theo just lived such a fun, fast life his body couldn't fight anymore. (That boy literally ran all day everyday his whole life!!) We didn't even make his one month ampuversary. 
We are grieving and I of course am at the stage of regret. Wondering if maybe I just hospitalized him he would recover, but then I thought well what if I lost him in the hospital if he didn't stabilize and I wasn't there with him. What if I brought him home only to let him drown to death alone while we were at work? I couldn't live with either of those two options. And he wasn't doing the one thing I promised him I would always make sure he could do, and that was play with his beloved baseball.
Theo went so quickly during the euthanization, it seemed like he was ready to go and accepted it. He fell asleep pain free with his baseball right by his side, and mom and daddy telling him how amazing he was.
Any advice for dealing with this time are so, so appreciated. Every thought, every move I make brings back a memory. Everything makes me cry, I cried pulling cheese out of the fridge last night because it's his favorite food, the last thing I even got him to be remotely interested in eating. Every password, every profile picture, every computer/phone wallpaper is my baby Theodore. I found out the Rainbow Bridge website does a candle lighting every Monday night at 9pm for our lost fur babies. They give you some really great prayers to say when you light the candles. The warmth of the light helped me a little and was good timing, I think we'll keep doing it.
Maybe when I'm feeling up to it I can tell you guys the story of Theodore's life and how he found me and we rescued each other...
Furever Snaggle Mom
I also wanted to mention that Wednesday evening marks the Jewish New Year, so Evan and I will hopefully try to find ways to remember that past but look ahead to the future...
My heart literally aches for you ... it's just not fair and it's so sad.... Theo was soooo lucky to have you! He knew how LOVED (and is still loved) soooooo much and to have you by his side ....
I am so sorry for your loss. The pain is unreal. I know that all to well. It seems like it will never end and it doesn't but it does become less and soon happy memories will fill your heart and mind instead of the sad ones ...
You gave him the ultimate gift ... relief from his tired body! He is running free over the bridge and I know my Shelby was there to meet him.
Much love,
Alison with the Spirit of Shelby fur-ever in her heart
Shelby Lynne; Jack Russell/Shiba Inu mix. Proud member of the April Angels of 2014.
October 15, 2000 to April 8, 2014
Our story: Broke rear leg in June 2013 - non-conclusive results for cancer so leg was plated and pinned. Enlarged spleen in September 2013 and had it removed and was diagnosed with Hemangiosarcoma and started chemotherapy. Became a Tripawd January 8th, 2014 and definitive Hemangiosarcoma diagnosis. Three major surgeries in 7 months and Shelby took them all like a champ only to lose her battle to cancer in her brain. We had 8 amazing extra months together and no regrets. #shelbystrong #loveofmylife
Online
And I shall light a candle tonight too and celebrate one of the most adorable dogs to ever grace this site......and to honor a most beautiful bond...a bond that can NEVER be broken.
I'm not sure how much I can type right now as I'm crying so hard with you. I KNOW this was almost imposw for you to write. I also know your grief is seemingly unbearable right now. I know the void...the routines...the habits...all just wash over you and you have no idea how you'll catch your next breath. And I also know there is nothing any of us can do or say right now except to let you know we understand like no others can.
I do want to address something that you need to embed in y our beingnright now...something n you MUST do for Theo! NO REGRETS...NO SECOND GUESSING because that's the piece of crap disease still trying to win...still trying to make you focus on "it" rather than Theo...still trying to separate you from the UNBREAKABLE CONNECTION you have with Theo! SCREW Y O U you pice of crap.....Theo is NOT letting you take anything away from staying united withnhis beloved humans...his best friends ever! This journey sets us up for failure after the transition IF we let it!!! It also sets us up to celebrate THE most glorious gift of time that we did have with our furbabies and to honor their legacy KNOWING...KNOWING...we did everything humanly possible to give them a life of love and joy!!! That's what Theo wants you to focus on! Yeah, regret is "normal", but just feel it once and then let it flow through you aand disperse itself away. Regret...did I do it too soon....regret...did I wait too long....it's an endless loop wuestion no matter which way you go. But I can tell you this with ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY....THEO MADE THE DECISION to transition his Spirit! THEO let you know he was ready to be released from a body that no longer served him. Theo KNEW you would give him the most selfless and loving gift we can give our pups when they ask for it. He is soooooo grateful.
The best advice I can offer right now is to stay connected to us. Again, we understand like know others can. The intensity of this journey...the intensity of decisions that need to be made....the intensity of thenups and downs...the intensity of non-stop caregiving and watching every move...the intensity of pride at their courage and tenacity...the intensity of LOVE is at a depth that no one else could understand unless you've been through it.
There's a saying around here..grief n is the price we pay for such an incredible love"........and there isn't a one of us who would trade that love for anything.
Dr. Seuss says "Smile because it happened...not because it's over".
Also, review some of the posts under this thread...there are some lovely poems and various ways that tributes have been paid that I hope will bring you comfort. Christine (Franklin) posted a lovely poem ........so many things here that Inhope will bring you comfort.
I'll PM you my phone number and hope you will use it....especially when those waves of grief wash over you and you feel like you can't breathe.
There isn't a soul on here who will tell you "this sadness will pass".... or that the last several days will easily be washed away...we will tell you that you WILL adjust and the happy memories WILL start to push the grief further and further away. And you will feel Theo in your heart and soul. He is still with you...he just changed locations! But he left his loving energy nestled right there in your heart!!!!! Pay attention when you get a little "extra" heartbeat, or a little "flutter"....that's just Theo wagging his tail or just curling up and snuggling with you!
Just asyou felt privileged to have Theo in your lives...Theo felt just as privileged to have you in his! Because of you, Theo knows what love is....he knows what joy is....and that cheese is the best treat in the world...nd how to play baseball!!!
And Theo is running around like crazy now...he can be Theo again! I believe Jerry is at the Bridge passing out Purple Hearts of Bravery and Courage to every newcomer! He wrote on the back of Theo's..."GREAT JOB SNAGGLETOOTH"! And everyone was there to greet him and play ball with him!!! I see him running to catch the ball right now!!!
Please, please, when you can, post more pictures and tell us more about Theo! We fell in love the first time we saw that mug!!!
Also, search "Tribute Leash" on here....it's a way we honor our heroes and celebrate their lives. AND...there is a thread here started by Bonnie, Polly's mom, called Tripawd Alumni...you'll find a lot of support and crazy fun there too!
Stay with us...lean on us........I think I shall light TWO candles tonight....a light as bright as Theo's can never be dimmed.
Surrounding you with Theo's eternal grace and loving, warm light...
Sally and My Eternal Light Happy Hannah
Happy Hannah had a glorious additional bonus time of over one yr & two months after amp for osteo! She made me laugh everyday! Joined April's Angels after send off meal of steak, ice cream, M&Ms & deer poop!
Damn. When you didn't come back to update the other thread I got worried. I am so sorry.
You did nothing wrong- you made the best decisions you could for Theo with love in your hearts. Cancer is a nasty bastard and sometimes it is so aggressive there is nothing you can do. If you hadn't done the amp you would be wondering if doing the amp would have given you more time.
As for advice- each of us grieves differently, don't let anyone tell you how it should go. Snaggle Mom and Dad need to work their way through on their own time.
I know what you mean about the fridge- I must have had 10 or 12 foods in there I got to try and entice Maggie to eat. When I got home after Maggie crossed over I immediately got rid of the stuff that had bad connotations- the food (because it reminded me of her not eating), the medicines, the sub-Q fluids, etc. But the stuff with good or even OK memories I left out: I left her food dish in her spot, I left her leash and harness in the closet, I left her bed in the living room, the toys in the box. I still had Mag's little sis Tani with me so I still had a pug to take care of. But most importantly I kept her blanket on my bed. She had slept with that blanket every night of her 11 years since I picked her up when she was 10 weeks old. That blanket stayed on my bed for a year, now it lives in the table next to my bed. Keep those things close to you that have good memories- the baseball especially.
I know it doesn't seem possible now, but the pain will ease, and smiles will replace tears when you think of Theo. For now let the Tripawds Nation help carry a little of your grief. And yes, please when you feel up to it tell us more about Theo. No matter how long or short the Tripawd journey you are family here.
Theo will live on in your hearts and so will always be by your side.
Karen and Spirit Maggie
Tri-pug Maggie survived a 4.5 year mast cell cancer battle only to be lost to oral melanoma.
1999 to 2010
So very sorry to hear of Theo's crossing. Please don't beat yourself up and second-guessing if you made the 'right decision'. You did what was best for Theo and allowed him to cross and be with Tahoe and all the other buddies.
This will be a tough time, and most here will attest to that. Everyone has said time will dull the pain but we are 5 weeks today since Tahoe crossed and it is very fresh. What I found as helpful as anything going through this process was to talk with others (especially a tripawd parent who has has experienced what you are experiencing), go for a long walk, try to give your mind a little break from all the thoughts an grief.
If you need an ear or any support, just PM me and let me know. I hope you and your husband can get to a point where you can think about Theo without the barrage of tears.
Hnag in there, we are all family and hurt for you.
Stirling and Guardian Tahoe
"Tahoe" - Our Amazing Superman and Best Friend.
Dec. 01-03 to Aug. 19-14
Diagnosed with Periarticular Hystiocystic Sarcoma Feb 14-13; Amputation March 18-13, and diagnosed with STS April-14. Tahoe touched so many people while visiting us, leaving a massive void in our lives. Always Missed, Never Forgotten!!
I'm gonna try and post a link to a few things...not very computer savvy...but here goes.....
Happy Hannah had a glorious additional bonus time of over one yr & two months after amp for osteo! She made me laugh everyday! Joined April's Angels after send off meal of steak, ice cream, M&Ms & deer poop!
This isone Tracy and Maggie posted
Happy Hannah had a glorious additional bonus time of over one yr & two months after amp for osteo! She made me laugh everyday! Joined April's Angels after send off meal of steak, ice cream, M&Ms & deer poop!
My heart sank when I saw this, words can't begin to express how sorry I am that Theo is gone. The speed at which this happened is so tragic and I know your grief must be tremendous, especially after coping with that kind of emergency. Please know you did everything right, you were both the best parents to him and gave him everything a dog could ask for. He loved you with all his heart, and he left you with so many beautiful lessons, a thousand legacies that will positively affect you and everyone he ever touched.
This is the time to allow yourself to feel the grief and express it however you need to. Everyone grieves differently so do not compare and just let the feelings flow as they will. Your husband too. You both have healing to do and the only way it can occur is to go through this awful process.
There are lots of things you can do to help yourself cope.
- First, stop by the chat whenever you're here. I'm in there now, and you'll often find folks in there during the evening. We are here for you.
- It helps to think of the good times and share his story. Write a blog post to celebrate his legacy and we'll publish it for Tripawd Tuesday.
- Create a memorial for him, photos, toys, candles, whatever fills your heart with love of the time you had together.
- Always remember, his last day with you is a blink, a spec in time, it cannot outshadow all of the good times you shared. Those beautiful moments of his life as a happy, healthy and active dog are so powerful, so filled with love, that they will always light up your world more than the dark times. Remember those moments when you start to feel down and you can get through this.
I'm so sorry. Theo's life will always be celebrated and cherished in this community and beyond. We are here if you want to talk. {{{{hugs}}}}
Tripawds Founders Jim and Rene
tripawds.com | tripawds.org | bemoredog.net | triday.pet
My heart hurts for what you are having to face now....I've got tears in my eyes....
Do not feel guilty for letting Theo go to the Bridge. I have no doubt his spirit was still strong but his body was just too tired to keep up. Know that he's not suffering and struggling to breathe now. He's running and playing with all his Tripawd brothers and sisters now and they are having a blast.
I do understand how difficult the suddenness of Theo's passing is. We were letting our Leland go on what should have been his 1 month Ampuversary. We put so much love and effort into getting our fur kids back to health after the amputation that for me I felt like I had let Leland down. But that's not the case and I'm still working on myself to come to terms with that particular feeling. This grieving sucks but it's a journey we all must travel because we love our fur kids to the moon and back and we will out live them. You and your family take all the time you need to work through the grief of losing Theo and don't worry or listen to those that say "you should just get over it." We all process loss differently and your family will get through this.
One thing that has helped me in dealing with the loss of Leland is staying connected to this community. For me helping other parents with support or advice that are just starting this journey keeps the spirit of Leland close to me. Please know that we are here for you to lend support and a shoulder to lean on when the grief gets to be a little tough to bear.
I'll be keeping your family in my thoughts.
Sahana and her Angel Leland
November 17, 2009 - June 30, 2014
May you finally be healthy and running free at the Rainbow Bridge. Until we meet again my sweet boy!
Everyone above has said it so well. I am so, so sorry to hear this. it is just such a hard time and there is nothing really that anyone can say that will make it feel better. Just know that we are here when you need us, here to listen. A lot of us have recently walked the road you are now on. I know I wanted to hitchhike to another road. I did not want the sadness, the guilt, the pain .It is sort of like the story of the bear hunt. Cant go over, under or around grief, you have to walk through it. We are here to help hold you up along the way. the only emotion you should have none of is guilt. I know, I know, I went there too. Just know that you did everything possible for Theo including releasing him from his tired body. This process is so different for everyone. There is no right or wrong way to process grief. I read above about someone throwing away meds,etc. I have not been able to bring myself to do that. It has been 5 and 1/2 months and his meds, blankets, etc are still in the dog closet. I still have his bag of blueberry treats that are labeled Ty Misner that I sent to the vet when he had to stay for his MRSA . Pictures, I immediately gathered every one I could get my grubby paws on. Other folks could not look at them for weeks or months. So, see nothing around here is considered weird or abnormal. Don't let anyone rush you through it either.It takes time and some people just don't get that. That is what is so helpful here. I could come here with my feelings and people could understand. Hugs and thoughts are with you, Lori and Ty
TY GUY, Best Black Lab ever! Diagnosed and had amp in January, 2014. Kicked MRSA's butt. Earned his angel wings on April 16, 2014. Run Free my boy and don't forget a shoe. Ty is a proud member of the " April Angels". Ty sent us Daryl, a Tripawd rescue in Sept. of 2016. Daryl is 5 +or -. We are also Pawrents to Chandler, a Border Collie mix who is 15 and 1/2, Lucy, a Corgi who is 7, 2 minis, 2 horses, and a feisty cat named Zoe. Zoe had a non skeletal Osteosarcoma removed in July 2015. No Chemo, she was at least 16. She is going strong although she is now completely blind. She is now close to 20 and her hobbies are eating and sleeping in front of her personal heater.
I have definitely had mixed emotions to items. I couldn't handle his bed, I threw it out, because he never liked his bed anyways and only started sleeping on it as he started feeling bad. And I threw out all the pills and food that I had made him and tried to feed him. I hated the pills and I hated that I couldn't get him to eat when I knew his body needed the nourishment. I will post in the donation topic section because I had literally just bought him K9 Immunity , Apocaps , and Artemix and I hope another pup can use them.
I'll keep everything else though, everything he loved and that really reminds me of him. How his collar jingled when he'd run, all of his balls, his brand new tripawd bandana, and pictures, I want every picture, every video! I even have my mom trying to reboot my ancient laptop from college that I think has baby Theo pictures on it.
I am so so very sorry to hear of your loss. I am now just catching up on your journey and I am sorry I wasn't around for support. I hope the new year brings some joy and peace. L'Shana tova.
xoxo,
Erica & Tripawd Kitty Jill
Jill is a 9-year-old tuxedo kitty. She was diagnosed with Osteosarcoma in June 2012 on her toe in her right hind leg. Her leg was amputated on 12/12/12 and she completed four rounds of chemo (2 of Carbo, 2 of Doxy) in April 2013. "Like" Jill's facebook page: https://www.fac.....tty?ref=hl Proud member of the WINTER WARRIORS!!!! Her blog can be read at http://jillsjou.....ipawds.com. xoxo
I am sitting crying right now........I am so very sorry for your loss of sweet Theo, we all very much understand what you are feeling....and no matter how long or short our journey is, the end result is always the same; immeasurable heartbreak, and pain that seemingly will never end. Theo will always be remembered, and you will always remain a part of this wonderful community. We are all here for you for anything to help you through, so please remember that, ok?
Keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers,
Love,
Bonnie & Angel Polly
I just saw your incredibe offer to Rocket.....you are one special soul, that's for sure!!! And Theo is just beaming with pride that you've continued his legacy that way...it's so life affirming!
And he's also tickled ink you have thrown those blankety blank pills away and that stinking bed he hated!!!! He sure doesn't need pills now! And his bed is ade from the softest clouds ever made and he is surrounded by a blanket of Angel Wings at bedtime....and the sound of you telling him how much you love him as he drifts off to sleep.
I would give anything to take your pain away....we all would. Just know that Theo knows you'll feel sadness.....that's what we humans do...but he wants you to feel happiness because he was in your life.
And I've not deleted one single picture or video of my Happy Hannah.......blurry....upside down....it doesn't matter...I'm keeping every one!!!
I'm gonna try and paste what that Sage Jerry said about the blink m of an eye......it's very important......
Always remember, his last day with you is a blink, a spec in time, it cannot outshadow all of the good times you shared. Those beautiful moments of his life as a happy, healthy and active dog are so powerful, so filled with love, that they will always light up your world more than the dark times. Remember those moments when you start to feel down and you can get through this.
Holding you tightly in our hearts..
Sally and My Eternal Light Happy Hannah
Happy Hannah had a glorious additional bonus time of over one yr & two months after amp for osteo! She made me laugh everyday! Joined April's Angels after send off meal of steak, ice cream, M&Ms & deer poop!
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