Caring for a Three Legged Dog or Cat
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Hi Tripawd parents,
This forum has been so helpful to me since my dog Roscoe's diagnosis last October of 2015. Four days ago, I lost my boy Roscoe. It feels really sudden because he was undergoing chemo and while he seemed a little lethargic, he was still his happy go lucky self! Even the vet said she was cautiously optimistic and one of his tumors even disappeared and the rest appeared stable! The night before he was wrestling with our other dog Bella and the morning of his passing, he woke me up SO excited to eat breakfast and go on a walk. When I got home later that day, I found out he had passed in his sleep, laying in his favorite bed. I am grateful his passing was so peaceful but I was shocked.
I think because in my mind I was in a sort of denial about the aggressiveness of his cancer, I thought he would go in remission, I thought I could save him (He had several soft tissue sarcomas all over his body and lung mets) and because of his tenacious attitude, I'm having a really hard time accepting his death 🙁 I honestly just want him back. I feel like there's this huge void in my life now and all my joy is gone.
Roscoe was such a huge part of my life, even doing every day little tasks. Does anyone have any advice on how to not feel so hopeless? My parents say just give it time, my boyfriend wants to get me a puppy, and all of my friends have been so supportive but nothing seems to be working for me...I know I need to give it time but I don't have any interest in anything lately and I don't want to sink into an actual depression. I'm having trouble moving into the acceptance stage. Should I volunteer at a shelter? Adopt another dog? Just let this play out?
Thanks to everyone on this forum. I know you all understand <3
Much love,
Kristin
Oh Kristin ~
I'm so, so sorry for your loss! You obviously loved Roscoe so much. We all wish for such a peaceful passing for our babies. 
There is no right or wrong way to grieve, it's been talked about a lot on here. Of course there's going to be a hole in your life, that's normal. Some people volunteer at shelters, some take in foster pups or even kitties, so that it's different and less commitment. It's ok to get another puppy right away if you want to, or wait awhile if you want. Roscoe will send you a sign when the right one comes along. Somehow, some way you will know the right one. Take whatever time you need.
Hugs to you and your family,
Donna
Donna, Glenn & Murphy
Murphy had his right front leg amputated due to histiocytic sarcoma at 7 years old. He survived 4 years, 2 months & 1 week, only to be taken by hemangiosarcoma at 11 1/2 years 6/12/17
Read about Murphy's Life on Three Legs
I'm very sorry that your boy Roscoe went on to the Bridge.
My first take is that you need to give yourself more time, it's only been 4 days...how many years was he with you? You loved him so much you have to give yourself time to properly grieve. There is no timeline for this- don't compare yourself to others or let people tell you you should be 'over it' this early in the process.
Sometimes putting together a video or slide show helps. You get a chance to remember happy times and share more about your boy with others. Maybe make a memorial for Roscoe.
I wouldn't go right out an get a puppy unless you feel ready- there are can be mixed emotions about 'replacing' our departed friend. There is no timeline for that either, I adopted Obie 5 weeks after Maggie passed (I still had one pug at home) but after quad-pug Tani passed it was 8 months before Elly joined our pack.
Karen and the Spirit Pug Girls
Tri-pug Maggie survived a 4.5 year mast cell cancer battle only to be lost to oral melanoma.
1999 to 2010
I am so, so sorry to hear you have lost sweet Roscoe. I think the fact he was a young dog is doubtless compounding your grief and as his cancer was an STS and initially a lower grade as I recall (grade 2?), all the statistics and studies would have given you the promise of more time. I wish for you it had been so.
Try your best to concentrate on the quality of life he had with you. Know that he knew how loved he was. And most importantly, that you did all you could to help him beat cancer. And finally, that he had fun and joy to the last with a peaceful passing.
Let the right time for another dog or puppy present itself. Concentrate on ways to celebrate him and the joy he did bring. Helping at a shelter, planting something beautiful in his memory, putting together a video - all great ways to channel your grief. As said above, there is no "right" way and no standard timeline you have to adhere to. Be kind to yourself.
So very, very sorry. 
Lisa, Minneapolis
On October 27, 2016, nearly 6 months after amputation, and 18 months since his cancer likely started, we lost Pofi to a recurrence of Soft Tissue Sarcoma in his spine quite suddenly. His canine sister also succumbed to cancer on March 1, 2019 - we lavished her with our love in the interim, but life was never quite the same without her only real canine friend. Cliff kitty had to leave us, too, suddenly, in August 2019. Lucia kitty grieved all these losses, but helped us welcome two new Lurchers into our home and our lives, Shae and Barley.
midnighter94 said
Oh Kristin ~I'm so, so sorry for your loss! You obviously loved Roscoe so much. We all wish for such a peaceful passing for our babies.
There is no right or wrong way to grieve, it's been talked about a lot on here. Of course there's going to be a hole in your life, that's normal. Some people volunteer at shelters, some take in foster pups or even kitties, so that it's different and less commitment. It's ok to get another puppy right away if you want to, or wait awhile if you want. Roscoe will send you a sign when the right one comes along. Somehow, some way you will know the right one. Take whatever time you need.
Hugs to you and your family,
Donna
Thank you so much for your kind words. He was larger than life so I feel like it's even more difficult if that makes sense? He was an in your face kind of guy so every second without him hurts 🙁
I think you are right that I will know for sure when I am ready, Roscoe will send me a signal from the beyond <33
hester said
I am so, so sorry to hear you have lost sweet Roscoe. I think the fact he was a young dog is doubtless compounding your grief and as his cancer was an STS and initially a lower grade as I recall (grade 2?), all the statistics and studies would have given you the promise of more time. I wish for you it had been so.Try your best to concentrate on the quality of life he had with you. Know that he knew how loved he was. And most importantly, that you did all you could to help him beat cancer. And finally, that he had fun and joy to the last with a peaceful passing.
Let the right time for another dog or puppy present itself. Concentrate on ways to celebrate him and the joy he did bring. Helping at a shelter, planting something beautiful in his memory, putting together a video - all great ways to channel your grief. As said above, there is no "right" way and no standard timeline you have to adhere to. Be kind to yourself.
So very, very sorry.
Yes, they were all grade 2 but I was told that apparently grade 2 can be somewhat unpredictable :/ Thank you so much for your kind words. Talking about it really does help.
Kristin I'm in the Tripawds Chat right now if you want to talk.
I'm really sorry to hear about Roscoe, what a terrible heartbreak, I can't even imagine. I think when you don't have a chance to prepare, it's even harder to process the loss of such a big part of your life. One thing that might help you do it, is to try to gather your energy and create something in his honor. Plant a tree in his name, make a pretty wall collage, start a little shrine with little things that remind you of him. Do something to help your brain come to terms with the loss, while honoring his spirit and feeling its eternal presence.
And only you know when it's time for another dog, don't let anyone tell you when it is. Your heart has to be ready and only you can know for sure when it is.
I hope that's helpful. My heart goes out to you, I'm really, really sorry.
Tripawds Founders Jim and Rene
tripawds.com | tripawds.org | bemoredog.net | triday.pet
krun15 said
I'm very sorry that your boy Roscoe went on to the Bridge.My first take is that you need to give yourself more time, it's only been 4 days...how many years was he with you? You loved him so much you have to give yourself time to properly grieve. There is no timeline for this- don't compare yourself to others or let people tell you you should be 'over it' this early in the process.
Sometimes putting together a video or slide show helps. You get a chance to remember happy times and share more about your boy with others. Maybe make a memorial for Roscoe.
I wouldn't go right out an get a puppy unless you feel ready- there are can be mixed emotions about 'replacing' our departed friend. There is no timeline for that either, I adopted Obie 5 weeks after Maggie passed (I still had one pug at home) but after quad-pug Tani passed it was 8 months before Elly joined our pack.
Karen and the Spirit Pug Girls
Thank you <3 I have been making a photo album of him on Shutterbook, which I think is helping a little bit. I just hope that I get an appetite back and start sleeping normally again 🙁 He was such a huge presence.
jerry said
Kristin I'm in the Tripawds Chat right now if you want to talk.I'm really sorry to hear about Roscoe, what a terrible heartbreak, I can't even imagine. I think when you don't have a chance to prepare, it's even harder to process the loss of such a big part of your life. One thing that might help you do it, is to try to gather your energy and create something in his honor. Plant a tree in his name, make a pretty wall collage, start a little shrine with little things that remind you of him. Do something to help your brain come to terms with the loss, while honoring his spirit and feeling its eternal presence.
And only you know when it's time for another dog, don't let anyone tell you when it is. Your heart has to be ready and only you can know for sure when it is.
I hope that's helpful. My heart goes out to you, I'm really, really sorry.
Thank you so much, Jerry. I appreciate you taking the time. I am trying to channel it into something positive without getting too upset. I have this weird feeling as though I don't want to accept it because then he is really gone and just a memory... I'm working on a photo album that has been helping a bit and I wrote down things I never want to forget about him.
Thank you again for your kind words.
I'm so so sorry for your loss of Roscoe! The shock of how fast it happened must be so hard to wrap your mind around. It sounds like Roscoe lived life fully until the absolute end. As time goes past I'm sure you'll be able to get solace from the fact that Roscoe lived life with gusto and full enthusium until the end. After being caregivers it does leave this huge void in our lives not to mention our hearts. Grief has so many stages. It's not just an emotion it is a process. It never goes completely away, but it does lessen some eventually when the joyful memories of having had that loving soul in our lives come back piece by piece. Allow yourself whatever time you need to heal. Know the price of loving fully is having to grieve fully. You will at some point know what you need to do for yourself to again bring joy into your life. Roscoe will always be with you and in you in spirit. Know your boy knew he was loved and cherished. Wrapping you in love and hugs at this hardest of times!
Linda, Riley & Spirits Mighty Max & Ollie
I'm sorry for your loss. We lost our boy Cole Saturday so I know exactly what you mean about the void and the little day to day things being sad instead of bringing joy. The pain from remembering him will eventually turn into smiles at happy memories. I keep reminding myself of that especially during the darkest times. It is hard to believe at this point though.
When we lost our first dog about 7 years ago, we had always said no dogs for probably a year; we couldn't bear to bring a new dog in too soon when he passed. Within 4 days, we started looking because we were ready, not to replace him but to add to our family. We had a baby Ella within 2 weeks. You will know when the time is right.
I am so sorry for the loss of both Roscoe and Cole. When my father died, I was struck that there was so much to celebrate about his life. He had been married for 35 years, had grandchildren (including my daughter) and great grandchildren through his second wife, and lived in a community surrounded by people who cared about him. Both Roscoe and Cole were obviously loved, and there is so much to celebrate about their lives too!
Otis - 106 pound lab/Dane mix, lost his right front leg to osteosarcoma on Febuary 9, 2016. Four rounds of carboplatin completed in April, 2016. Lung mets August 25, 2016. Said goodbye too soon on September 4, 2016. Lost his adopted sister, Tess, suddenly on October 9, 2016. likely due to hemangiosarcoma.
Wherever they are, they are together.
Kristen and Coles Mom
Im so sorry for your tremendous losses this past week. I get it Kristen when you said Roscoe was larger than life! My Zeus was too, 146 lb Rottie. I still have days I wish I was with him there instead of being here. He was the man of the house and I never had children. As weird as this sounds I think you were given a small gift when God took him to the Rainbow Bridge, in his bed in his sleep. My last night with Zeus was horrible but my small gift was my girlfriend Lisa got to me and followed me in the ambulance to the vet. We all know your pain too well. Please lean on us. I walked into the support group I go to and even after 5-6 months after I could barely finish my story. I love my life down here but I know everyday that passes is a day Im closer to him. You will have lots of joy again. I will ask Zeus to go look for Roscoe...
Love,
Deb, Belle, and Angel Zeus
linda8115 said
I'm so so sorry for your loss of Roscoe! The shock of how fast it happened must be so hard to wrap your mind around. It sounds like Roscoe lived life fully until the absolute end. As time goes past I'm sure you'll be able to get solace from the fact that Roscoe lived life with gusto and full enthusium until the end. After being caregivers it does leave this huge void in our lives not to mention our hearts. Grief has so many stages. It's not just an emotion it is a process. It never goes completely away, but it does lessen some eventually when the joyful memories of having had that loving soul in our lives come back piece by piece. Allow yourself whatever time you need to heal. Know the price of loving fully is having to grieve fully. You will at some point know what you need to do for yourself to again bring joy into your life. Roscoe will always be with you and in you in spirit. Know your boy knew he was loved and cherished. Wrapping you in love and hugs at this hardest of times!Linda, Riley & Spirits Mighty Max & Ollie
Thank you <3 He certainly did live with gusto! He was larger than life and so happy all the time. I'm trying to follow in his footsteps. I appreciate you taking the time to reach out to me. This forum is so amazing <33
Sincerely,
Kristin
greydrizzle said
I'm sorry for your loss. We lost our boy Cole Saturday so I know exactly what you mean about the void and the little day to day things being sad instead of bringing joy. The pain from remembering him will eventually turn into smiles at happy memories. I keep reminding myself of that especially during the darkest times. It is hard to believe at this point though.When we lost our first dog about 7 years ago, we had always said no dogs for probably a year; we couldn't bear to bring a new dog in too soon when he passed. Within 4 days, we started looking because we were ready, not to replace him but to add to our family. We had a baby Ella within 2 weeks. You will know when the time is right.
I am so sorry for the loss of Cole <3 I hope you are right about the pain eventually just being happy memories. I'm trying to keep myself from going down the 'dark rabbit hole,' as I have been calling it and playing the 'what if' game.
It's nice to know that you got Ella so quickly after. I was thinking perhaps a new puppy or young-ish dog would turn my loss into something more positive? I'm sure Ella helped you with that! I feel like I'm seeing everything in a negative light and I need to snap out of it!
Hugs to you and your family
Kristin
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