Does someone you know have a crate you can borrow for a few days? I too have heard that they can think of it as a safe place, kind of like a den. Not sure for Nia, as she was probably caged at the shelter. It is just too stinking hard not to love on them when you are at home. My lab had to pretty much sit right next to me when I was home, but to my knowledge did not bark a lot when I was away. What helped him was the fact that I had another dog. He was very dependant on his brother. The TV may help. I am sure that as she becomes more secure and realizes you come back, she will get better also. Have you tried just leaving for like 1 minute and then coming back and giving her a goodie then 2 minutes, I know, not practical, but just throwing stuff out there. She is so special, she so reminds me of my TY. Looks just like him. Sleeps like him too. She is lucky to have found your family. Love from, Lori and TY

I went through sep anx with Boomer when I brought him home.  The first time I left him in his plastic crate (which he had been trained in at the sanctuary and had no issues while he was there), I was gone for about three hours and he pooped and peed in the crate and drooled himself a swimming pool.  It was a mess!  The next morning, my Mom and I had to take our family dog, Shelby, to the vet as she had started having seizures overnight.  When we came home 45 minutes later, Boomer had chewed an 8x8" hole in the side of his plastic crate and had pulled my entire queen size comforter into the crate with him - needless to say, the comforter was destroyed, so I let him keep it in a new wire crate for snuggles and my scent.  Essentially, for the first three weeks that I was home with him, I couldn't leave the house without somebody else here to watch him.  Fortunately, I hadn't found a job yet, so I was able to work around his needs.  I decided to stop crating him and just try leaving him closed in my bedroom with Amy (my other dog) because I basically had to wrestle him into the crate anyway.  That simple change did make a difference for him but I still bought a wire crate for him to sleep in at night thinking that if I could get him comfortable overnight in it, he would then be comfortable when I was away, but it didn't translate for him.  Being crated with me in the room was never really an issue for him but when I tried to crate him and leave, he would panic.  I tried to work him up to it before his amputation, but then the addition of the soft cone in the crate freaked him out to no end (pain meds also played a role I'm sure) and I ultimately had to take my bed apart, put the mattress on the floor, and leave him closed in my room as usual - just without anything to jump on and off.

To work through the sep anx in those first few weeks after I adopted him, I found the most effective approach to be the leave and come right back method that has sort of already been mentioned.  I started out by putting them in my room like I was leaving and close the door, then open it almost immediately.  Each time I closed the door, I would stretch the interval by a little more - 5 seconds, 8 seconds, 15 seconds, 30 seconds, 40 seconds and take a few steps away from the door, 1 minute and go to the end of the hall until we worked our way up to an hour of me sitting quietly upstairs reading while they were closed in my room.  Then I started going outside but for maybe only 10-15 minutes at first, then more, then I opened the garage door and drove my car out but didn't actually leave the driveway.  It was a lot of baby steps. 

My goal was to never let him get to the panic point.  I wanted the experience to always end before he hit that freak out so I would listen very closely and I quickly started to know when the he was starting to worry and I would end it before he escalated.  If I waited too long and he started yowling and freaking out, I would go back to a shorter interval the next time - if he panicked at 5 minutes, I would go back to 3 minutes the next time and inch my way back up from there.  It can definitely feel like a two steps forward one step back process initially but you will be able to hear it more and know when to call it quits.  I would hear Boomer start to move around more and that told me he was getting close and it was time to open the door.

I would never make a big deal about them going in my room or coming out, I didn't love on him when I opened the door (hard, I know, but it really helped keep his excitement down and that translated to staying calmer overall) and almost had to act like he wasn't even there.  It was really important for him to keep things as calm as possible and that included not being happy-excited or lovey-excited, any excitement makes him not calm and not calm made him panic more quickly.  If he knows that when the door opens nothing super-duper exciting is going to happen, he isn't so anxious for it to open, if that makes sense.  I still loved on him when we were hanging out at home, but I just didn't do it when I was leaving or getting home.

In the course of a day, I would do as many sessions as I could without overwhelming him.  Initially, I would do maybe a 5 minute session of basically just closing the door for a few seconds up to maybe 30-45 seconds.  I'd give him a break for an hour or so and we'd do some more but the next time I would start near the amount of time I ended on last time - if the last time we made it to 45 seconds, I would start with a goal of 30 this time (listening closely in case he started getting too nervous) and work up from there.  Once I got to the point where I was doing longer periods, I would do one "door closing" at a time with somewhat shorter breaks in between.  If he did okay for 15 minutes in my room, I would give him 30-45 minutes out then do 17 minutes in then another 30-45 out then maybe 20 in until I was able to actually leave the house.  The first few times that I left the house (as in, got in the car and drove away, not just faked it and sat in the driveway), my Mom stayed home, very quietly, just in case he melted down after I left.  I would leave for short periods of time and, just like I had with closing the door, build up a little more each time.  A few trainer friends told me that once you hit the four hour mark with a sep anx dog, you are probably alright, sep anx is much less likely to kick in after that point (of course, with some dogs, that is when you start to run into potty needs, but that is another issue).  It can be difficult and overwhelming to work through at first but it can be done!  If your neighbor is willing to watch her when you have to leave and nobody in your home can stay with her, that will be really good for Nia.  You might also consider enrolling her in daycare for a few weeks while you work through the anxiety issues, so that when everybody has to leave the house, she can go somewhere positive and perhaps not have so much anxiety.  Daycare isn't cheap but if you can swing it for a few weeks worth of sessions, that might help the process.  It is hard to manage schedules and everything during the desensitization process but doing so can really help ensure Nia is not forced to be alone and reach the panic point because that will push the whole training process way back.  For now, think of her like a three-year old who always needs a babysitter, be it someone in your family, your neighbor, a friend, or daycare.

If you do think you want to get a crate for her, ask around at your local pet supply stores to find out what their return policies are.  At the store where I work, we accept returns on virtually everything in the store (including crates) for any reason for up to 90 days (and it does not have to be in resellable condition).  It is an investment, but it is a little easier to make if you know that you can take it back if things just really don't work out with it.

-Allison