I dropped Shelby at the vet this a.m. and tried SO hard to be a strong pack leader. I held it together pretty well (you would think, her 3rd surgery, I would be used to this by now). She was shaking a bit but for the most part - really good spirits. Really good. She was active and animated this a.m. before we left (sharking around for food/water which she could have none of). I did get her 1/4 of a tramadol last night when out of the blue she started shaking like a leaf. 35 min later, we had an earthquake. Go figure - she was trying to warn me! But both of us slept through the night.

I talked to her surgeon last night who agreed, again, this is the best option for her. The other option would have been radiation therapy which is really just pain management so I think we picked the right course of treatment - even knowing she does have terminal blood cancer. If she is pain free for even 1 month it will be worth it in my eyes.

So now I wait. They will call before she goes in and when she comes out. I am really hoping they do her surgery this a.m. so I don't have to wait ALL day. I did come to work but thankfully, it's a light day for me so I can distract myself with forums and emails. And since they have visiting hours, I will go see her tonight, knowing she will be drugged and high as a kite.

I also looked at photos on this site last night of post-op after reading Jerry's books about preparing. I don't know if anything will really prepare me to see MY baby like that BUT she's had worse. They took a huge chunk of her neck once for biopsy and that was pretty intense. I am just going to look at her eyes, tell her she's beautiful and that her mama loves her more than life itself. And I think my home is ready for her. The good part of her limping is that she's already prepared to be a tripawd. I have carpet. I have flat yet cozy beds for her with lots of warmth.

I will keep y'all posted! Thank you again!!!

Alison (and Shelby).