Thanks all, I appreciate your kind words so much, more than you know.  I'm trying not to have regrets (should have amputated sooner, should have started chemo sooner, or not started it at all to avoid the side effects these past few, final weeks).  And I'm trying hard to just soak in these last few days with her.  

We came home with Tramadol and Deramaxx, so hopefully these provide her with some relief.  It's hard to tell right now, as she is pretty doped up from the sedation for the x-rays.  

I'm petrified of letting her linger too long.  I'm awaiting my regular vet's thoughts on the x-rays, but we're leaning toward helping her reach the end at some point this weekend.  The vet tech at our regular vet (a friend from college) will be coming to the house, to make it as un-traumatic as possible.  

We have always celebrated her birthday on the 4th of July (you never know the real birthday of these pound puppies, but we got her late August, at around 8 weeks old, and tying her birthday to a holiday seemed like a festive idea!).  We'll have a 9th birthday blowout for her - anything she feels like eating, she will get!  And hoping for some sunny days so she can lay around surveying her yard, which she loves to do.  

This part is just.so.hard.  

Our primary vet is on vacation this week, but I did speak to my vet tech friend who is holding down the fort at the office with a stand-in vet.  She received the report from the specialist and was less pessimistic than we both were upon initially hearing the news.  The specialist's report doesn't say anything about how far advanced the bony lesions are; just says that we're discontinuing chemo and starting pain management (and a fairly low dose at that).  Still waiting on the X-rays to be sent over.  

These bony lesions are just like the OSA tumor in the first instance - fast growing and I'm sure very painful.  You also run the same risks of bone deterioration to the point of breakage.  Can you imagine a broken back or pelvis?  That sounds horrible and not a risk I'm willing to take.  But, the vet tech cautions that we should hold off on final decisions until 1) we see the X-rays (shadows, like her primary tumor first presented?  Or much further advanced, as her primary tumor was 3 or 4 months later?  Her spine and pelvis were clear about 3 months ago when she was last X-rayed); and 2) we see how she does on the pain meds.  

That anesthesia buzz did not wear off yesterday.  She actually is moving around a bit better -- when she's not totally spaced out.  She did sleep like a baby last night and hasn't needed Tramadol since 8 p.m.  Soon, she'll get more Tramadol and the Deramaxx!  We'll see how the next couple of days go and how the X-rays look when they're finally passed along to us.  We have terrible rain forecast for the next 3 days, though it's nice it will be a bit cooler -- here's hoping for a few sunny days in the not-so-distant future that Miss Lili feels well enough to enjoy.