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MY BELOVED BROWNIE
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Forum Posts: 3077
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16 May 2020 - 7:21 am
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We finally had a weather break here and I spent the evening with my husband in the yard. Have needed some ‘normal’ time so very badly. Been working in our garden and checking out the new birds in the yard. Found a new species that we have never seen before, they visited 2 days in a row! 

Anyhow.. I know I am digressing .. but I missed this last night. All of it. I LOVE Brownie’s pictures Nancy! That one on the deck.. heart melter sp_hearticon2 And you added “March Saint” to your signature… great idea Sally!

Rene, I love that photo do-over. Brownie, like Saint Francis, has been a guiding light to many a soul here… it’s perfect sp_hearticon2

Hugs and love to all of you sp_hearticon2sp_hearticon2

Hugs,

Jackie, David, Bo, Andy, Oscar, Angel Mitchell, and the coolest feral tripawd kitty Huckleberry

Huckleberry's Blog

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16 May 2020 - 8:30 am
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Wow I love the photos you posted of Brownie! He seems to be such a good boy on these sp_hearticon2

It is really nice to see all the good memories you have of him. That’s what we all need to focus on I think. 

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16 May 2020 - 9:06 am
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Jackie – So happy things are getting back to normal for you.

Patricia – Thank you. Trying to focus more on the years before the cancer.

My Beautiful Beloved Brownie was diagnosed with Osteosarcoma on February 26, 2019.  With all odds against him he lived an additional one year and eight days with amputation, love, and prayer.  I was honored to be his mom, and I have never been so proud!  He will live forever in my Heart!

Brownie Bubba Bell

04/01/2007 - 03/05/2020

"March Saint"

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27 May 2020 - 10:15 am
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My Dear Beloved Brownie,

On June 5th it will be three months since you passed over. I have cried many tears, have had sleepless nights, and have missed you so much! If I was granted a wish for anything in the
World, it would be to have one more day with you. But Brownie, that was my old way of
thinking, and a new day has begun…

I will no longer mourn your passing. I will no longer be sad, or feel lost. I will begin to celebrate your life, and celebrate your spirit that is whole again and happy. I will celebrate the magnificent beast you are. The dog with the biggest personality that ever wore earth clothes. I will remember how blessed we are that we had so many wonderful years together. Yes, there were some rough times, but we made it through. We made it through together.

On April 1st I released balloons to celebrate your 13th birthday. That evening I saw the biggest brightest star shining over our house. I was so drawn to that star. I got a warm feeling, and a feeling of comfort. I knew at that moment, that you are still with me. Some evenings, after the sun goes down, I go outside to the backyard. And in that same spot, I will see that star shining so bright. I know you are telling me that everything is going to be ok. You are letting me know that we have made it through rough times before, and we will get through this too, together. I gave the star the name of “Brownie’s Star”.

The first time I saw you on a chain, I thought you needed me. But the truth was I needed you, and you knew that. When you escaped your chain you could have gone anywhere you wanted, but you chose to find me. You picked me to be your mom. How honored, proud, and happy I am that you picked me! I will always be your mom, and you will always be my Bubba.

Brownie, this tribute is for you. It is a small way for me to thank you for loving me……

I loved you yesterday, I love you today, and always…..

Mom

My Beautiful Beloved Brownie was diagnosed with Osteosarcoma on February 26, 2019.  With all odds against him he lived an additional one year and eight days with amputation, love, and prayer.  I was honored to be his mom, and I have never been so proud!  He will live forever in my Heart!

Brownie Bubba Bell

04/01/2007 - 03/05/2020

"March Saint"

Green Bay, WI


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27 May 2020 - 11:12 am
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Beautiful Nancy! Tears rolling down my face, (not gonna lie, sobbing a little too); losing a leg sure didn’t slow him down, or take away his joy for life. Thank you for sharing this priceless tribute. 

It sounds like you’re in a good place, confident in knowing that even though Brownie left your side, he will never leave your heart. Hugs to you, my friend…I’ll be searching the sky for “Brownie’s Star”

Paula and Warrior Angel Nitro

Nitro 11 1/2  yr old Doberman; right front amp June 2014. Had 6 doses carboplatin, followed by metronomic therapy. Rocked it on 3 legs for over 3 years! My Warrior beat cancer, but couldn't beat old age. He crossed the Bridge peacefully on July 25, 2017, with dignity and on his terms.  Follow his blog entitled "Doberman's journey"

http://nitro.tripawds.com

"Be good, mama loves you".....run free my beautiful Warrior

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27 May 2020 - 11:19 am
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That was amazing Nancy, could not keep the tears from flowing… that was just so honorable and beautiful. I know Brownie is smiling. You captured his essence, and he was still the same happy Brownie even after surgery. You took such good care of him, and you did not let him suffer when it was time to gain his wings and leave his earthly body behind. 

And on top of that you are still here helping others. Brownie’s a special pup… and his mom is a special woman. That tribute.. just so beautiful. 

Hugs and lots of love,

Jackie and Huck sp_hearticon2

Hugs,

Jackie, David, Bo, Andy, Oscar, Angel Mitchell, and the coolest feral tripawd kitty Huckleberry

Huckleberry's Blog

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27 May 2020 - 11:27 am
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Hi Nancy. That was an incredible tribute to an incredible pup!  I know that Brownie is your heart dog and I feel like I got to know a bit of his personality through that video.  Thank you for sharing Brownie’s light with the rest of the world!  sp_hearticon2 Stacy

The Rainbow Bridge



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27 May 2020 - 12:13 pm
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Awwwwwwwww I’m smiling and teary-eyed too, you did such a beautiful job with this Nancy!

Wow it was a lot of fun to see Brownie from the beginning, and to watch him throughout his entire life. What a very special boy, he was clearly meant for you. I could see that in the photos of you together, you two shared a bond that will never be broken.

I’m so honored you put the Saint Brownie photo in the video smiley4

Thanks for sharing your heart and soul dog with us, it’s really a privilege. He will never, ever be forgotten.

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27 May 2020 - 1:20 pm
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Nancy, that letter to Brownie to let him know you are now able to start focusing  on all those thousands of Happy and loving times uou shared will make him soooooo happy!!  I know he’s been worried about you. With that letter you freed him to fully engage in his new found joy at the Bridge.  I think he was holding  back a bit and not wanting to play full out yet with all the other dogs until he knew you would  be okay. 

As the lead MARCH SAINT he has been busy greeting so many newbies back home, enjoying the fears they share together, playing ball, just having fun!  But when he got that letter and saw his tribute  video he stopped doing everything and called a Bridge meeting.  He was sooooo proud and soooo touched  bu everything  he just had to share it with everybody!  Eceryone was so Happy for him and for you to be able to share so much ofnyour loves together  and to focus on all that joy.

My tears have dried (only because I haven’t  watched a second time yet because I want to get this out to you without crying first)!!!   But I will watch it again because , even thru those tears the first time I was able to smile.  And THAT is what a tribute  should do.
Every single photo  Nancy, told a story of who exactly Brownie is!!  The photos represented such Happy times…happy, joyful loving times
Knowing that Sassy didn’t  like other dogs made me smile because  she didnt  mind being photographed  with Brownie.  Sweet photos.
There’s a photo of a side view of a close up of  his head that is so beautiful.   He truly seemed to be in a -Zen space.
Of course, watching him demand his 7:00 treats is such a hapoy memory!  And my goodness, was that a huge bully stick he had in that one video?? It was huge and he is so proud!!!
It made me so happy  seeing he and Grizzly having  soooo much fun just being dogs!
Nancy, the thought you put into this…the way you were able to capture the essence of Brownie…the true essence of is…it was ALL guided by Brownie!  It had his paw print all over this glorious tribut!!  And it truly is glorious Nancy.
Brownie loved a GLORIOUS life and now he lives a glorious  life as your eternal shining  star.  Okay, gonna get choked  up again, but the way the closed out the video with the balloons  heading  up to the Rainbow Bridge and then showing this star……..oh my goodness, absolutely  beautiful way to show he is with you.
Nancy,  I really can’t find the words to express what a PERFECT reflection of Brownie’s  life this video is.  I can ‘feel”  that this has helped you move more and more towards the exquisitely  happy life Brownie shares with you.  He needed you to do this.  He needed to see that you are able to focus  more and more on these sacred joyous times you two shared.  He is so proud  of this tribute.   So proud of you.
I know this post will help others who have recently  experienced  the “transition ” to always remember  their lives were  well lived and well loved❤
Extra hugs 
Sally and Alumni Happy Hannah and Merry Myrtle and Frankie too!

Happy Hannah had a glorious additional bonus time of over one yr & two months after amp for osteo! She made me laugh everyday! Joined April's Angels after send off meal of steak, ice cream, M&Ms & deer poop!

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27 May 2020 - 7:58 pm
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Thank you Nancy.. I do understand…Brownie’s Star is shining bright.sp_hearticon2sp_hearticon2

Livermore, CA




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28 May 2020 - 4:12 pm
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That is beautiful! 

His spirit shines though as does your love for your beautiful, handsome boy.  He is obviously living on in your heart.

Karen and Spirit Maggie

Tri-pug Maggie survived a 4.5 year mast cell cancer battle only to be lost to oral melanoma.

1999 to 2010

 

              Maggie's Story                  Amputation and Chemo

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29 May 2020 - 8:54 pm
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WOW Nancy, thanks for sharing this. What a wonderful tribute. As everybody else, I could not keep myself from tearing up.

What a wonderful dog. 

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31 May 2020 - 3:13 pm
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Thank you everyone for your heart filled replies. Yes, Brownie was a huge part of my life. Every decision I made for the past 12 years included Brownie. I think Jackie said it best when she said “Brownie is your world, and still is.” Now I am trying to get use to the new norm. I have a lot of making up to do with Sassy and Max. They pretty much got put on the back burner when Brownie was diagnosed. I feel bad about it. They are having more walks, and car rides. They both got a new harness, and Max got a booster seat for the car, and Sassy got a seal belt.
Thank you all for being here for the past year, celebrating the victories, and being so supportive when things were going down hill. Brownie’s last couple of months, he fell a couple of times, but bounced back. But each time he bounced back he fell harder. I really think he was trying to hold on for me, and I couldn’t let them happen. When we started this journey, I only wanted two things. I wanted Brownie to be happy and pain free. I believe we accomplished that.

Some of you may remember the beautiful card that Paula posted when Brownie passed. After reading the card I just had to have the necklace. I received it not long ago. As Paula carries Nitro’s heart in hers, I carry Brownie’s heart in mine.

Lana & Tyson: I received the gift book today, “Every Dog Has an Angel”. It is beautiful, and I love it. I have it sitting on Brownie’s nook next to his picture. That was so sweet of you! With everything that is going on with Tyson, you thought of me. I am honored.

For the ones just beginning this journey, the only advise I have is to embrace each day. That is what Brownie taught me. As some of you know Brownie is my third dog with cancer, so please post your victories, so Brownie and I can celebrate with you. If we all do that, maybe one day this horrible, disheartening disease will be a thing of the past.

Again, thank you all for being on this hell of a roller-coaster ride with Brownie and I.sp_hearticon2

My Beautiful Beloved Brownie was diagnosed with Osteosarcoma on February 26, 2019.  With all odds against him he lived an additional one year and eight days with amputation, love, and prayer.  I was honored to be his mom, and I have never been so proud!  He will live forever in my Heart!

Brownie Bubba Bell

04/01/2007 - 03/05/2020

"March Saint"

Green Bay, WI


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31 May 2020 - 3:32 pm
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That last sentence says it all…..it sure was a hell of a rollercoaster ride! I too felt I had to make things up to Kodi, for being pushed to the background for over 3 years while we dealt with all of Nitro’s needs. Kodi was the ultimate big brother – he didn’t seem too concerned when all the focus was on Nitro; almost like he sensed that’s where our priorities needed to be. Kodi was an only dog for just about a month before Grizzly  came to live with us. I know what you’re thinking, “that’s not much time to rule the roost”. And chronologically, you’d be correct; it was way too quiet here, and still way too sad. I firmly believe that adding the terror tots to the household has kept Kodi young. 

I have a feeling Sassy and Max knew exactly why your attentions were turned to Brownie, and they were OK with it.

I’m glad the necklace brings you comfort like mine does me…hugs, now and always

Paula and Warrior Angel Nitro

Nitro 11 1/2  yr old Doberman; right front amp June 2014. Had 6 doses carboplatin, followed by metronomic therapy. Rocked it on 3 legs for over 3 years! My Warrior beat cancer, but couldn't beat old age. He crossed the Bridge peacefully on July 25, 2017, with dignity and on his terms.  Follow his blog entitled "Doberman's journey"

http://nitro.tripawds.com

"Be good, mama loves you".....run free my beautiful Warrior

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31 May 2020 - 4:27 pm
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I totally love that picture of Brownie that you just posted sp_hearticon2 Ok, like you and Paula have said… I am going to join that group. When Huck got hurt and I knew he needed medical attention I focused ALL of my time and effort into what needed to be done to get him into our home. When he had his surgery, again I focused on him. It was everything I had to convince Huck that he wanted to finally have a home where he would be cared for and loved. I did get to focus some time on the other boys as I introduced them and tried to make our blended family happy, but David did most of the caretaking for Mitch at that time and boy oh boy did I get the guilts after. 

Mitch had 4 legs. But like Brownie as he neared the end he got bad and then rallied. Got worse and then rallied harder as I tried to do the best I could for him. 

I think when one of our furbabies, or anyone we love really, needs us and is not doing well that it is an automatic overdrive that we go into to try and help/fix/comfort them. 

We are all in the same boat. Once they are gone we always wonder what if, maybe I.. I am learning that we just do the best we can and it is always out of love. That has to be enough because we give all that we have in our hearts. 

I think Paula had a ring made from Nitro’s ashes. One day, I am going to do that with Rosies ashes. I have also thought of getting a tattoo. I cannot have her real paw print because the one that I got back when she was cremated got brittle and broke without even being touched. I have a couple of ideas though smiley16

Sending hugs and lots of love sp_hearticon2

Jackie and Hucksp_hearticon2

Hugs,

Jackie, David, Bo, Andy, Oscar, Angel Mitchell, and the coolest feral tripawd kitty Huckleberry

Huckleberry's Blog

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