Thank you , That does help knowing what you went thru and how Maddie and Samson are so similar. But Know i feel as if I let him done by waiting to get all of the info from different Oncologist service that uses SRS technique . They just sent over a video of there findings and what there prognosis is. The biggest difference between them and Samson's Dr is there's no amputation but a 40% higher cost and 4 days of driving him there and back for the treatments that will last approx 3 with him being knocked out or longer  ( its a 2.5 hr ride each way) but the done side to SRS is that he has a 40% chance that the bone will fracture after 6 months leading back to amputation again . But he would be pain free , but Samson is not one to not jump or bounce around . And by waiting for there review if his records and the video we missed the soonest appt for surgery with hi Dr. which was yesterday afternoon . 

And know he is in alot of pain ( heavy breathing , not hungry barely moving ) He threw up Wed night ( mainly his food and some of his Gabapentin) but he went outside pottied , then laid down in the grass to relax . He loves the chilly winter mornings , well a fed ex delivery showed up unexpectedly when my back was turned and Samson took off and scared the poor guy by barking at him but also hurt his bad leg doing so . We got him in tried an ice pack on his leg , then he had to go out and vomitted a small amount of food and some of his pain med . He insisted on staying outside and just walking a around the yard for 4 hrs . But now he wont eat and is painting very heavy and refuses to take his meds ( you cant force him to take them as he will snap at me ) Just for perspective I recently had spinal surgery and have issues getting around for now , so picking him up couldn't happen .

I just feel like by me waiting for a different option I made it worse for him . And I'm leaning to go with the amputation and chemo because there's less stress on him without all of the driving for 4 days straight ( and he freaks out in hotels , tired it once not a good idea) But his Dr.s next available day is next Wed , and I hate to see my boy in so much pain .

I'm going to try some different foods to see if i can get this pain med in him to help . 

I just feel so helpless right now 

I did speak with his Dr. and he thought it could be a GI tract issue ( maybe something he ate or a side effect of the Gabapentin) For now he is resting the drooling has stopped and his breathing has normalized deep and constant ( like normal ) but he's not interested in food still. I doubt his ankle is fractured now as he let me rub both legs and feet with out any indication of discomfort ( and he's not 1 to shy away from nipping me if something hurts ) . The Dr stated if he does change or settle down to bring him in right away . He's resting now but if he stays the same later tonight or in the am he's going to them . He has walked around but favored the paw ( but hes been doing that since he first hurt it ) uasually to move from one spot to the next. 

Its not so much the sedation that's holding me up as his Dr. will be keeping him there for 4 days and nights to monitor him and help him get used to the loss of a limb , their doing this mostly for Samson but also for me as I just had spinal surgery on 10/28 and can barley lift a milk jug right now .But Samson Dr. and I spoke and agreed to seek out other viable alternatives to amputation , which is SRS radiation treatment ( but its almost twice the cost of surgery and chemo ) with the same length of time he would be around . The only thing the scares the crap out of me is the SRS also has a 40% chance of bone fractures after 6 months , meaning worst case scenario he'll need amputation then !! But with SRS he keeps his leg IF the bone isn't to fractured , they haven't told me if he's a good candidate yet . I have a tele conference set up with them for Tuesday ($200 fee for it ) for them to let us know if he qualifies of not and what he treatment plan would be . The plan for his condition can vary between 7300-8500 on average or more if further treatments are needed . And if we went that route ( if I can find the extra$$) its a 2.5 hr ride each to the hospital , then the sedation , treatment 30-45 min and then 2-3 hrs before he comes out of sedation ( he does very poorly with it ) and this needs to be done once for the ct scan then 3-4 days in a row for the treatments . 

So I'm just trying to weight the be possible option, least stressful option for my boy . I owe him atleast that much since he has done and given me so much more then I could ever put into words ...