Caring for a Three Legged Dog or Cat
Tripawds is your home to learn how to care for a three legged dog or cat, with answers about dog leg amputation, and cat amputation recovery from many years of member experiences.
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My eyes are red and checks soaked after reading this. WTF is right. Damn this disease. I'm so sorry for you. I am empty. I ache for you. Your boy lived quite a life, 11 strong years of the most indulgent love ever. You did right by him and are doing right by him now. He'll soon be free to romp and sleep wherever he please. I wish you loads of comfort in these next few days because you'll be thinking of all things that 'might have been done' or 'only ifs', but we all know here, and you do too deep inside, that you did everything, and everything to the end. A loved life indeed.
HUGS.
~ Katy & Jackson
ACL tear in right hind leg 12/5/12 and scheduled ACL repair surgery 12/21/12. Pre-op xrays revealed osteosarcoma. Amputation 12/28/12. Chemo (carboplatin) started Jan 10, 2013 and ended on April 5, for a total of 5 doses. He handled carbo like a champ! No side effects. We started metronomic therapy at his third chemo and have been also doing some holistic treatments. He's a lively, playful 10 year old huskie-boarder collie and a very proud member of the Winter Warriors! Our love. Our funny little guy!
This is so heartbreaking. i ache for you and kermit. It's so wickedly unfair and painful. I wish there was something I could say that would actually help.
I know you know you are not alone in this, even though it feels so lonely. So many of our dogs did this out-of-the-blue business. Dakota mirrored Kermit almost exactly. Rumbles did, though he had 2 or 3 good months after discovering it. There are others.
Unfair. It's totally and completely unfair. If love could heal them, they'd all be well. Kermit certainly would be with all the love he's got.
In my signature, I say that Dakota raced off to find out what was over the bridge. Perhaps Kermit has decided that it's just too enticing to keep it a surprise, just like so many of our best friends. When they want to go see what's there so badly, we have to let them go. He will take a part of your heart with him, but he will guard it and protect it until your time here is done, too. He will be your guardian always.
Shari
From abandoned puppy to Tripawd Warrior Dude, Dakota became one of the 2011 February Furballs due to STS. Our incredibly sweet friend lived with grace and dignity till he impulsively raced over the Bridge on 12-15-12.
Dakota's thoughtful and erudite blog is at http://shari.tr.....pawds.com/
So very sorry to read this. But I will let Kermit's 11 good years stay in my memories not that stinking cancer! Such a wonderful beautiful boy who had a very special bond with his very special human.
God Speed Kermit!
Please know you are in our thoughts and prayers.
Patricia and Atlas
I am so, so sorry to hear this-sweet,sweet Kermit. Please know that you are in our thought and we are sending you many hugs. This is such a difficult time-losing our furbabies.
Thinking of you,
Joan and Lily
Our beautiful Lily was diagnosed with osteosarcoma in her front leg on 12/14/11 at age 8 and had amp on 12/16/11. She completed 5 rounds of carbo. She was so brave and kicked cancer's butt daily! She lived life fully for 4 years, 3 months, and 15 days after her amp. My angel is a warrior princess. I miss her so much.
Ohhhhhh.... So sorry for being late to read this and so sorry to read this news about Kermie 
Cancer f***ing sucks. Please know that we are all thinking about you. It is so unbearably hard to say goodbye but as one of our wise Tripawd pawrents said to me - be gentle with yourself. I know what you are going through - we said goodbye to our beloved Daisy a week before and were completely blindsided by her downturn. How the f*** did we go from clear chest rads on February 16 to saying goodbye 3 months later. I wanted answers that weren't there......I wanted accountability,,,,,I wanted my little girl back. None of these were possible. I still cry very day (sometimes hiding in the bathroom at work) and hope against all hopes that the pain will eventually start to subside. Please know we are here for you - whatever you need. Xoxoxo
Alicia
A dog never truly leaves your side. They just lay with you so quiet and peaceful that you can only sense their presence in your heart.
I'll apologize now for this long bit of soul-searching... I don't want to be a downer but I don't know right this moment where else to go.
I'm still suffering this loss in such a fresh way that the pain is sometimes almost unbearable. I sit here sobbing while I type because I can't feel his presence at all. No spirit dog, no presence, no angel, just nothing. A big hole.
I even have a bunch of stuff to give away & help others on the angel forum & can't seem to bring myself to post it. I have Kermit's laundry that, a month later, I can't wash because I'll wash away all trace of him. I haven't been able to get his ashes from the vet because I can't bear to look at that little box of sand & know that it's my baby boy in there.
I've read about doing things like creating a memorial at your pet's favorite place... but his favorite place was with me, no matter what. He was like another appendage. I'm actually planning to have his ashes made into a diamond, but (aside from the tremendous expense), I simply can't face it yet.
Immediately after his death I escaped for the weekend, and then for another week, taking our other dog and experiencing all sorts of new things together. We were sad, but we had fun. But back at home for several weeks now, everything is empty. And the dog is fine. She's living for the moment, as dogs do. 
I've helped so many people through loss. I've dealt with loss myself. I never in a million years would have expected to be steamrolled like this. I'm shocked, I'm damaged, and I'm trying to find grace through it all but finding only darkness. I've always actually enjoyed being alone but I guess I never really realized how un-alone I was as long as Kermie was a presence in my life.
Yep, I am a recovering canine codependent. I knew it before, but because I try to "Be More Dog ", I've always thought I accepted death as a part of the natural way of things. So I have NO idea why I can't seem to get my head above water in this.
I've signed up for an e-course and today I ordered some books on grieving pet loss, but even looking at the covers makes me break down. My husband, who always thought my attachment to the dogs was a bit ridiculous, can't talk about him without crying either. I can't share this with other friends & family because I've never even grieved lost family members this way & they'll think I'm nuts. If someone came to me after this much time I would have judged THEM the same way had i not experienced this for myself. My husband & I have cried together, we've laughed together, we've suffered the loss together & escaped it together. But he's better at squelching it. I don't believe in squelching, I believe, "If you're going through hell, keep going" through to the other side. Where the hell IS the other side?
It has occurred to me that "I'm not crying about what I'm crying about", but so far I haven't come up with anything else I might be secretly sad about- the rest of my life is ridiculously awesome. So maybe it really is just codependency- I miss being needed?
I'm not totally despairing...intellectually I know I'll get through this eventually. But for now? Not a clue how to move forward.
Sorry again for the long rant, I just had to get it out & didn't know where else to go.
Kristine,
I'm sitting here sobbing, I just don't have the right words to say. I honestly feel your pain and your grief through your words in the pit of my stomach. I've been trying to think of what I would want someone to say to me, and I just can't think of anything. I know that's not helpful, and I'm sorry there are no words for this. and I'm sorry I am not there to give you a hug right now.
It's not fair that this happened. There's no reason for it, and you have every right to be angry, sad, grieve for all the time you need and want to. All I can really offer you is my support. If you want to talk, you know I'm always in the chat room , or PM me and we can chat on the phone, anything you need. I am truly so sorry for your loss and your pain.
big hugs through the internet,
Erica
Jill is a 9-year-old tuxedo kitty. She was diagnosed with Osteosarcoma in June 2012 on her toe in her right hind leg. Her leg was amputated on 12/12/12 and she completed four rounds of chemo (2 of Carbo, 2 of Doxy) in April 2013. "Like" Jill's facebook page: https://www.fac.....tty?ref=hl Proud member of the WINTER WARRIORS!!!! Her blog can be read at http://jillsjou.....ipawds.com. xoxo
Ohhhhhh Kristine.....you KNOW you are in the right place!
You are where you are in this whole gut wrenching grieving process. It really is that simple. Please don't analyze yourself on where you "should be" or how you"should" feel now! This is how you are grieving and there are no rules in this family!
I will say your head is now above water because we must flew the latest tripawd life jacket over to you. Put it on. ow and it will start holding your head up above water. If you look closely, you'll see Kermit's picture on the left shoulder..-.r. maybe the right. He's whispering in your ear, "I'm still here mom. You can't feel me or see the clues I'veleft because you are too cdeep in tried right now."
As far as the codependency fix-----you must hand around here when you can! We NEED you! We've missed you terribly!
Kris, this stupid things g is gonna a cut off any minute so I may have to get back later.......but til it cuts off....I'm still typing (typi g sort of!)
For now, don't worry about giving things away....it's not the right to e....and may never be
You may------or may not feel better when you have Kermit back home with you. K always did. The idea of the pendant is lovely, absolutely lovely.
You were Kermit's soulmate as he was yours. You were his everything during g this journey, you were is caregiver. You have a huge whole in your very existence. You are even questioning your belief systems that aren't working for you. ow. YOU ARE GRIEVING! You are NOT crazy ( well, not anymore than you've always been:-) )
Be gentle on yourself. The ONLY thing I know to be yrue---as do you----Kermit would hurt for you to see you sad----although he would understand------he would want you to think of some
Happy Hannah had a glorious additional bonus time of over one yr & two months after amp for osteo! She made me laugh everyday! Joined April's Angels after send off meal of steak, ice cream, M&Ms & deer poop!
Honey--you are GRIEVING. There is no right way, no wrong way, no same way. And sure, all the books and experts and self-help sites can give you tips and tricks, and some may work, and some may not...but there is no boilerplate.
And I know you know this--and I can feel your frustration. Sadness, yes, but also frustration. Because you KNOW in your rational, thinking, I've-helped-other-people-through-this, mind that there isn't one answer, and that everyone is different and that every LOSS is different...but yet your unconscious, animal-brain mind is trying to find structure and make sense where there is none.
Probably not helpful to you, but an analogy: I have panic disorder. When I have an attack, my rational mind KNOWS that there is not a hurricane/tornado/heart attack/brain anuerysm/stroke/bridge collapse going to happen to me at that second. I KNOW I am having a panic attack and that my fears are irrational. But that part of my brain is losing to the autonomic response of my body and my systems going "RUN RUN RUN RUN!" And while the abject terror is bad--the frustration at trying to reconcile those two things is ALSO part of the problem.
You know there is no one set way to grieve, and that the only thing that will help is time, and that this is all natural. But damnit, you WANT order and healing and a schedule. And then you're frustrated b/c your two halves of your brain are bitching at each other, and they are leaving you holding the leash while you are at your most vulnerable.
So go ahead and vent...rant all you need to. Someone is always here to listen. They can't always have answers, but they can always listen. <3
"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable, let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all."
-Douglas Adams, Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency
"May I recommend serenity to you? A life that is burdened with expectations is a heavy life. Its fruit is sorrow and disappointment. Learn to be one with the joy of the moment."
-Douglas Adams, The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul
Well, first of all Dharma you have to grieve the way you do. Shoot it was month & months when I had to have my first Rotties cross the bridge before I could talk about them. Everytime I did I broke down crying. I couldn't even think about them without crying. So I totally understand.
You can talk to us anytime that is what we are here for. Not just support while our babies are a live but even after they have crossed the bridge.
All these feelings you have are normal feelings. No one can tell you when its the right time to move on or stop grieving. You will know when things are right. It just stops hurt so much.
Totally understand the empty house thing.
hugs
Michelle & Sassy
Sassy is a proud member of the Winter Warriors. Live long, & strong Winter Warriors.
sassysugarbear.tripawds.com
07/26/2006 - Sassy earned her wings 08/20/2013
05/04/2006 - Bosch, Sassy's pal, earned his wings 03/29/19 fought cancer for 4 months.
"You aren't doing it TO her, you are doing it FOR her. Give her a chance at life."
I have no advice, but I wanted to tell you that we are all thinking about you right now. Yes, you realize that one day the grieving will pass and that you will be left with wonderful memories of Kermit. One day you will be able to smile again when you think of his memory... But for now, allow yourself to grieve.
I have had 4 dogs and 5 cats in my life that I have been blessed to know and have passed on. I cried for them all, regreting that we could not have more time together, but time seemed to heal the missing piece of my heart and life. I'm sure I grieved for them all differently, and there is no right or wrong length of time that is "appropriate". Please feel free to pour out your heart here, you could never find a more understandng, welcoming group of people here. (But, you already knew that!)
~Jessica
04/09/13- OSA Diagnosis ~ 04/23/13- Left Forelimb Amputation ~ Carboplatin Chemo (6 total)
July 2006-November 18, 2013
I will always love you, Athena.
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