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Monkeybutt Wire (reuters):

news from the front...a secret message has been received from the elusive 'monkeybutt elmo'.  squirrel boy sam received a cryptic message, sent from the chicago syndicate (presumed) advising of the recent perils of said elmo...

unverified, the message is as follows:

I was happily minding my own business, enjoying life when suddenly i was transported into a nightmare.  The huge creature with whitish fur and a big, long tongue pounced on me and kept me captive for months on end.  I thought I would never escape!  She tortured me daily for what seemed like forever, but from the scratch marks I put on the wall it was only 7 days.  She drove me so crazy that my eyes turned around backwards in my head! 

Her mom rescued me for awhile - I heard her tell the creature that I might hurt her.  As if!!  Who was it who cracked my eye right in half and started munching on it!

Anyway, one day the mom pulled me out of the safe, dark haven where I was living.  She was muttering omething about needing to fix my eyes so I could visit Felony Melanie.  My ears perked right up - I was finally going to escape Zuzu's clutch!  But Felony Melanie?  Uh oh... nothing could be worse that life with Zuzu, right?  And my sight might be restored - hey I might even be able to look out of the front of my head instead of the back!   (although it is sometimes useful to have eyes in the back of your head when you are living with a monkeydog!)

Hey, Felony Melanie - I am not heading your way and hope you are much nicer to me thant that creature who held me captive all these months.  You can't be any worse, right????

upon receiving the message, SB Sam held an ET syndicate meeting to discuss the impending arrival.  Additional information was received from some syndicate 'moles', indicating that elmo had recruited a new monkeybutt ally, and was now bragging about being the 'elusive monkeybutt dynamic duo' (aka elmodydu).  stayed tuned to The Monkeydog Monitor for further updates.