Caring for a Three Legged Dog or Cat
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Hello,
My hound Miso had to have a leg amputated about a year ago. Since then, I've been struck by how often strangers comment on her tripawd status. Last week, without hesitation, a mother told a child, "That dog has three legs!" Someone at the dog park asked me, "Is that your three-legged dog?" Numerous strangers ask me how she lost her leg with no awareness that the story might be painful or private. If Miso were a human, I can't imagine the same kinds of comments would be made. I don't want her to be defined by the number of limbs she has, and it feels rude to me that strangers make these comments.
I'm reaching out to see if others have developed good techniques for addressing these kinds of comments from strangers?
Thank you,
Hannah
Hi Hannah and Miso♥️
We actually have a thread/forum where members have posted their replies when comments were made. I'll try and find it,
My favorite response was said with shock, "Oh my gosh!!! I hadn't noticed!!!"
Hugs
Sally and Alumni Happy Hannah and Merry Myrtle and Frankie too!
PS My tripawd's name, Happy HANNAH
Happy Hannah had a glorious additional bonus time of over one yr & two months after amp for osteo! She made me laugh everyday! Joined April's Angels after send off meal of steak, ice cream, M&Ms & deer poop!
Hello.
Here is a blog post from a couple years ago: Negative Comments About Tripawds Don’t Have to Be a Bummer. I think this is what Sally was looking for?
It's a compilation that Jerry put together from from Tripawds members who have dealt with comments.
One of the most memorable ones I got with my first Tripawd Maggie was not said to me but I overheard one lady tell another "oh look, how cute, that dog has 3 legs". As if it was some type of accessory I chose! Since it wasn't said to me I just walked away.
The one I get most often is something like 'awww, poor thing!'. I got it with Maggie and I get it with my current Tripawd Elly. If they seem open to a conversation I try and educate the person on how inspiring Tripawds are and how well the adapt to life of three.
The one that hurt the most was said by a woman to her young daughter who seemed a bit confused by Elly hopping along. It happened in the early, scary days of Covid so she wasn't allowing her kid to get close to us at all. She said to her daughter 'well, at least it's alive' and the child looked a bit horrified as they hurried away. I really wanted to talk to the girl and explain to her how well Elly was doing but I didn't get a chance.
It doesn't bother me if people ask why my dogs lost a leg- Maggie lost a back leg to cancer, Elly lost her back leg to a car accident when she was 7 months old. What does bother me is people judging my choices for my dogs. I've heard: 'it's just a dog', 'I would never do that to a dog', and even once something like 'she must not have much of a life'. That one made me so mad I don't remember exactly what was said. I have found that people with that type of attitude are not open to discussion and are not worth my time. It's something I've had to work on but I'm not going to let rude and/or ignorant people ruin my day so I try and smile, say 'have a good day' and walk away with my happy, hoppy Tripawd.
Karen and the Spirit Pug Girls and Boy
Tri-pug Maggie survived a 4.5 year mast cell cancer battle only to be lost to oral melanoma.
1999 to 2010
Thank you Sally and Karen! I like the idea of responding with humor and there are some hilarious lines here! Hopefully humor will not only diffuse any tension, but also make people think. I look forward to deploying these in the future :).
I could also imagine occasions when humor wouldn't work or feel appropriate. I welcome others' ideas on this.
Thanks,
Hannah and Miso
Oh gosh you will hear it all now that you've joined our club! And over time you'll have a few different comebacks for different types of comments and people. You'll have the quick ten second "this is what happened, don't feel sorry for her" story for people you don't care to engage with, and you'll have the gentler version to help educate little kids.
For Jerry and Wyatt Ray , and now Nellie, we have used everything from "Sssh! Don't tell him, he doesn't know!" to "Don't feel sorry for her, she doesn't feel sorry for herself and you shouldn't either!"
In my working life I often write articles for a human amputee magazine. After interviewing dozens of people with limb loss, I've learned that those types of inquiring, filter-less people don't just limit their questions to canines, many will also say similar comments to human amputees as well. Sheesh.
Did you happen to see Boo Boo's post, "He's Not a Pampered Dog!" You will be able to relate to it, check it out.
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