Oh my gosh, I had so much doubt the first couple of weeks after Murphy had his surgery!  But after he was feeling better I realized that we did the right thing.  Murphy was initially misdiagnosed, like so many dogs are, we thought he had a sprain or strain, and his initial x-rays were "fine", although the radiology center didn't medicate him for them and did them quickly.  I guess they assumed that since he was walking, he couldn't have a break, but he was taking anti-inflammatory and pain medication, so he was feeling better and not limping right then.  When his prescription ran out, his pain came back and he yelped and cried, wouldn't eat or go outside.  It took awhile to get the appointment for the orthopedic specialist, so by the time he had his x-rays and biopsy he had been limping for about 4 months. Then the biopsy was inconclusive and the next x-rays showed a worsening tumor, so we went ahead with the surgery, so then it was about 5 months from when he started limping.  That's a really long time to wait when it comes to bone cancer.  But, it's been 2 1/2 years now, and Murphy is still with us, and he's still healthy and happy and hopping around!  So I have no doubts and no regrets for what we did.

What you've done for Buddy is to give him a chance at life.  A chance for more days in the sun.  A chance to play in the snow.  A chance to cuddle and give kisses.  A chance to be pain-free, even if it's for a little while.

Donna

Ditto everything that has been said!

But also a question---you say 'get through it w/o losing my mind'.  So even though Buddy is doing well, perhaps you're really just so so sad that your dog has cancer and you might not have all the years with him that you wanted? That is also a very hard thing to deal with---recognizing that there will be an end. When you get a cancer diagnosis, that fact sort of slaps you right in the face. 

Unfortunately, even if our pups are perfectly healthy we never get as much time with them as we want. But what you've done is to make sure that whatever time you do have with Buddy can be w/o the pain of OSA. Now you and he can focus on living and loving each other. There should be no guilt! You've done a brave thing for Buddy. Your decision was made out of love. How can it be wrong?

Denise, Bill and Angel Ellie. 

Hi Julie and Buddy - he looks so sweet!!

I can only echo what others here have said, the emotional and practical support here is amazing.  My Maggie is a month and a half post surgery and every day gets more and more "normal" (always a relative term) and my doubts about treatment subside a bit more every day.  As others have said, the shock of realizing your dear pup will not live forever is unfortunately part of the equation even as you are focused on getting him/her to feel better right now.  For us, I think the whole experience has forced me to come to terms with this fact, and in a way has been a blessing in that our whole family has been able to give Maggie the attention and love she deserves in her "golden years"!  She's 12 and we're hoping she has many good old-lady years left with us, but I've come to realize that she isn't counting the days on a calendar, she is just happy every day that she gets to be with her people, sniff around outside, and terrorize squirrels.  With amputation, she can do all of those things now without pain and look happier than she has in a while (I'm sure the extra attention and doting helps, too!). 

The first 3 weeks for us were pretty hellish, even though Maggie had a relatively uneventful recovery - I stressed out about everything, and the fact is those first couple of weeks are a huge adjustment.  But it won't take long before Buddy is acting like himself again and you'll be able to just enjoy every fun moment together. Something I had to do was actually write down every little improvement, so when I lost my mind (yeah, happened plenty of times) I could point to something concrete and see that things were getting better.  Even with one step forward, two steps back - it helped to remember the little successes.

You're definitely in the right place for talking to people who "get it"!  I realized pretty quickly that my coworkers and neighbors don't really want to hear every detail about my dog's incision or vomiting!!!! 

Hang in there, Julie!  And rest and keep up the great progress, Buddy - you're doing great!!! 

Cindy and Maggie