I want to tell a story about how the Tripawds community has positively impacted my life.  I am the second of four daughters and my oldest and youngest sisters each have two daughters.  My youngest sister’s girls, ages 4 and 10, have known about Griffin’s amputation and recovery from the beginning, and they follow his progress through the Griffin’s Journey blog.  But my oldest sister delayed telling her girls, ages 9 and 13, about Griffin fearing that it would upset them too much.  The 9 year old has some issues with anxiety and both girls have struggled with adapting to life during the pandemic which has prevented them from engaging in the many activities (sports, volunteering, Girl Scouts, school) that they love, so my sister was hesitant to give them the news about Griffin which she knew would be upsetting.  As we are now more than 2 months post-surgery for Griffin, I wasn’t sure how much longer my sister planned to wait (that set of nieces lives 6 hours away and the others are 4 hours away, so avoiding the topic is easier than if we lived close).  She replied to the email I sent saying that she felt things were still too unsettled for the girls and perhaps in a month’s time.

This was my reply to her: You are their mom and know them best, so I'm not arguing that you should tell them.  I just want to share that I don't think the news about Griffin is sad.  It was definitely scary for a while, but he is doing really well now, so I don't want the narrative to be one that is framed as upsetting news, although clearly it will come as a shock to them.  I think they would really enjoy reading the updates about him that I post on the blog and seeing him thrive would be something positive.  Knowing the girls, they would start researching stories about other animals that underwent amputation and learning about how some of them use prosthetics or wheelchairs.   I'm not trying to convince you to tell them, just that when you finally do, to keep in mind that his story is a positive one of overcoming odds and living life to the fullest each day.

And this was her response:  Honestly, I wasn’t thinking of it as positively as you put it, but you have a point. I was thinking more about it as he had cancer, this is the treatment, and the average life expectancy is 1-2 years, which is not so positive.  Since you frame it so well as more optimistic, why don’t you tell them over a Zoom meeting? Then you can answer any questions they have, and they could see how well he’s doing. If you have time, this weekend is free.

When I read my sister’s email, I immediately thought about how her mindset of being focused on the negative was the one that I had prior to finding Tripawds and how through my engagement with this awesome community, I was able to shift her perspective to the positive lens through which I view Griffin's life.

And so today, my nieces and I video chatted and after hearing their many bits of news, I gave them the update on Griffin.  I started by showing them Griffin laying across the room (far enough that you couldn’t see his missing leg) so they knew he was fine.  I told them about his tumor and surgery, and then showed them photos and videos to document his progress from the beginning until now.  They took the news very matter-of-factly, asked some questions, and then moved on.  At the end of our call, the younger one asked if there was anything else that could have been done to help Griffin besides amputation, and after I explained that it was the best option to make sure he wasn’t in any pain, she said, “Griffin is really lucky to have you as his mom because you take good care of him and do whatever it takes to keep him happy and healthy.  I don’t think Griffin really cares about having only 3 legs because it doesn’t stop him from doing anything, right?”

Out of the mouths of babes.

Hi Jade!  Welcome to the Tripawds family!  One thing that might be helpful is showing your kids examples of how other dogs have adapted because there will likely be some rough patches during recovery and you want them to know what it will be like for June on the other side of that, a few weeks after surgery.  I have documented Griffin's story pretty well on the blog Griffin's Journey and perhaps that would be a useful resource.  Good luck on Friday! ~ Stacy