It's been a few days since I've been able to read some posts and provide some of my own thoughts... every one I've ready tonight has inspired me to share an update on my Smokey.

To make a long story as short as possible (which probably still won't happen )... Smokey was diagnosed with malignant melanoma on June 19th. 

Since February he had had a sore on his large paw pad on his front right leg.  His limping would come and go but I never saw the sore.  In April he had gotten really sick.  Vomiting, diarrhea, lack of appetite... after numerous tests (x-rays, bloodwork, ultrasounds) he was cleared with a perfect bill of health.  He was put on meds and two weeks later he was perfect.

Smokey had a growth on his cheek that we had removed and he was put on a drug (which is completely escaping my mind right now, but sometimes used for arthritis?)... during our visit to remove the stitches, I mentioned the limping.  The vet felt his leg and just decided it must have been arthritis, never even bothering to look at the pad.  It wasn't until a few weeks later after he recovered from his illness in April that it hit me to look at his pad and I saw the sore.  So back we went to the vet.  And to a new one, not the same older gentleman who figured it was just arthritis.

Dr. H thought it could have been just an infection so we tested out antiobiotics.  It wasn't improving so we did a biopsy and that's when we found out he had skin cancer.  Skin cancer of all things - I didn't even know dogs got that, let alone on the paw pad!

So... we visited an oncologist, we visited the surgeon... I was completely against the amputation - how could I possibly take Smokey's leg from him?  He was 11 years old... how could he get around?    I was determined to just have them do the pad removal and replace it with other pads from other paws. 

It wasn't until our surgeon consult that it hit me how serious this could be.  He was fabulous and put me in contact with another pawrent who had just gone through this in January of this year.  We chatted and she completely motivated me.  A friend of mine did as well, asking me - would you rather have Smokey with three legs or not at all?  So the call was made to book the surgery.

Because of their surgery schedule and one week to where I wasn't able to bring him in, a month later he was having his front right leg amputated.  A whole month... which of course brings me to the what if game (more on that in a bit)...

I was terrified... a friend of mine was supposed to go with me but she got stuck in another city due to a canceled flight so I had to take Smokey in by myself.  The hospital had zero information for me on when the surgery was scheduled or how long it was going to take.  It took from 11:30am to 4:30pm before I heard a word...

Surgery went well - no complications.  The next day when the surgeon called to give me an update, he then went on to say that he had noticed Smokey's lymph node hear the armpit was a little discolored so he removed it and sent it in for testing.  I still don't know why he told me the day of his surgery.

Anyhoo... I would get daily updates from the hospital on how he was doing.  But not once did I ever get a hopeful update.  Every time I've dealt with people at the hospital (with the exception of the surgeon and the team in the back of the hospital) it has been absolutely atrocious.

A friend of mine went to visit Smokey for me, since I knew I would completely trust what her thoughts were after seeing him, which were all good 🙂

My parents came to town to go with me to pick him up.  The woman at counter handed us the discharge instructions and said to "make sure you read through everything so you don't have to call us with multiple questions."  I'm sorry, what?  I couldn't believe what I heard... I thought I was mistaken but no, my mom had heard the same thing.  Extremely rude.  It's not as if this were an everyday procedure for us - they removed an entire leg... I was in shock.

As soon as I heard Smokey coming out from the back, I jumped up and ran to the hallway and was so happy to see him!  I smothered him in kisses and didn't even notice the missing leg!

The first day was very, very hard.  We were traveling 3 hours south of Portland so Smokey could recover at my parents house.  Once we got down there and got him out of the car, he plopped down on the grass and wouldn't move.  Somehow we got him in the house.  My dad and I were watching him, happened to turn our heads for a second and all of a sudden Smokey was at his water dish!

Each day got better... he got more energy... there was a huge difference once he was done with all of his pain meds.  It took him a few days before having a bowel movement, but once he had one, boy did we celebrate!

Two weeks later we came back to Portland.... my mom and our family dog Harley followed to help us ease back into our new ways of doing things... that first night Smokey was so happy to be home!  And he tried everything possible with Harley so he was definitely back to his old self!

We live in an apartment... which I wish we were in a house so we didn't have to walk far, but he's been doing very well.  We've had one bad night - I think he was on his feet for too long - he plopped down on the grass and wouldn't get up at all, not even for the other dogs that would walk past us, which he would normally run after.

But since then, all is good... we did get the bad news during our surgeon check up that the cancer spread to the lymph node he had removed.  I totally shut down and lost it.  We had stopped by Dr. H's office so she could see Smokey - I wasn't ready to chat then, but we're now scheduled to go in on Tuesday for another set of x-rays and to learn what everything means.

I'm not ready to let him go and he's not ready to go anywhere... Smokey is a fighter!  He's running and playing with his toys... and he's 11 1/2!  He acts just like a puppy... he's the best dog I have ever had...

So here's to hope - hope that the cancer didn't spread further and that I'll have him for a lot longer.  Especially since the amputation was the way to get rid of all of the cancer completely, given it was isolated to his paw pad.  I'm still angry about that but every time I look at Smokey's face, I fall more in love with him and enjoy every second I have with him.

So our fingers, toes, legs, arms, and everything are crossed that Tuesday will bring us good news....