Caring for a Three Legged Dog or Cat
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Anyone who has lost their first dog can surely attest to the difficult emotions associated with letting go of your first ever furry soulmate, and welcoming a new dog into your life. We can totally relate after losing Jerry and learning to love Wyatt.
Have you lost your first furkid, and eventually gotten a new dog? Perhaps you have not yet connected with a new pup. Please consider sharing your thoughts and experiences, so that others may more easily come to terms with mourning deep loss while develop new pack bonds.
Did you ever get another dog, and how long did you wait?
If so, how did you know when the time was right?
If not yet, what is keeping you from doing so?
What were your biggest challenges to accepting the loss of your first?
What milestones to you recall marking the development of your connection with the new dog?
Tripawds Founders Jim and Rene
tripawds.com | tripawds.org | bemoredog.net | triday.pet
Cemil is a new dog. I lost his uncle Zeki very unexpectedly one day when he was 7. When I left for work in the morning, everything was normal and he was fine. When I got home at 7 pm that night, he was dead. All indications were of bloat. That was one of the worst days of my life.
Zeke had helped me to feel safe, since I live alone, and I felt really vulnerable after he was gone. And I just missed him. For the personal safety part, I felt the need of another big dog almost immediately. I knew that I'd bond with the new dog if I raised it, so I didn't wait any longer than I had to. I contacted the breeder I had gotten Zeke from and learned that there was a litter planned. It was born about 5 months after Zeke died. There were reservations for all the pups already, but one person didn't respond to the news of the litter and I got his spot. Cemil is not Zeki, but he is a special dog on his own, and "my" dog. "Cemil" means a Good Gift, and he has certainly been that.
The first dog I lost was my basenji Robin, who developed cancer that wasn't diagnosed until it was in her lymph system. I mourned her for 8 months or so, and didn't want another dog until one day I was walking down the street and saw a portrait of a family with their basenji in the window of a portrait studio. At that point, I was ready to look for another one. I got Sommer as an 8-week-old puppy and bonded with her during the course of raising her. The same with Cemil.
For me, the connection happens with caring for the new dog. I've gotten puppies and I've rescued adult dogs--puppies need care because they're babies, and older dogs get sick or injured and need care, and that seems to be the thing for me that strengthens the bond. That, and time. The process of getting to know a new dog is delightful for me, and that helps too. With Mujde, I rescued her because God said "That's your dog", but I didn't really feel it for a couple of years. I don't know the milestones; only that one day I realized that she truly is "my dog".
Maybe not much help here, but I know that with a loss comes intense pain, which causes you to turn your focus inward onto that pain. The way out is to turn the focus to something outside yourself--a puppy or another needy dog works pretty well. And it honors the dog you've lost by showing the world that having a dog in your life is important.
Mary
Cemil and mom Mary, Mujde and Radzi….appreciating and enjoying Today
Our situation was a bit different, but similar in that it was a conscious decision to add to our pack PRIOR to losing Trouble. Trouble had just finished chemo when we discovered our long time internet friend, Angie, had succumbed to her long battle with brain cancer. We knew she had placed Duke in a kennel when she became unable to care for him. With the aide of another mutual friend, we located the kennel and discovered the family did not want him, he had been relinquished to the kennel and was adoptable.
When we made the decision, we assumed Trouble was on short time. Maybe Duke would help ease the pain of her passing. We are approaching two years now. There is no doubt, it took time to learn to love Duke. He isn't Trouble in any way. They are not similar in personality or in stature. It takes a lot of commitment to take a new dog into your house under any circumstance. They are not replacement dogs, as the original pet will never be replaced. They are instead an opportunity for you to love and care for a new friend.
Shanna & Spirit Trouble ~ Trouble gained her wings 3/16/2011, a 27 1/2 month cancer survivor, tail wagging. RIP sweetheart, you are my heart and soul. Run free at Rainbow Bridge.
The November Five - Spirits Max, Cherry, Tika, Trouble & Nova. 11/2008 - 3/2013 An era ends as Queen Nova crossed the Bridge.
I hate to tell you admin. but I think most of us here are way past our first buddy, unfortunately due to our MATURITY!!!!!, but I'll put my three paws worth in. Most of the time we've always had at least 2 dogs at a time, so when we got a new pup, usually courtesy of the girls, it usually learned from the older one. I don't like to keep a dog tied so we've usually let them run free since we have the space, as long as they don't go to the neighbors, which I would tell them if that happens let me know and we would have some training sessions, basically a talk saying don't do it again!!!!! but the young ones usually learned from the older ones where the boundries were. Anyhow when Gus became our only dog we didn't consider another one because he wouldn't tolerate another dog or any other animal, but that was ok. When we were going through his journey with cancer our daughter informed us she was pregnant and we had alot of work to do on her house, so we made the decision that when the time came, we wouldn't get another one because we knew the baby was on the way plus we were spending everyday for 3 months working on her house, and we all know how much work a new pup or dog is, so to be fair to the dog, that was the initial reason for not getting another, but I did warm to the idea of not having to get up in the middle of a cold night to let a dog out, or have to get home to let them out or feed them. This is the longest I have ever been without a dog in my life, and I am really starting to miss having one, but losing Gus was harder for me than any other dog I've ever had, and to be honest I don't know if I want to go through losing another one, as much as I know I could rescue one and give it a life it might never have, and I have been looking at a few, I kinda like the freedom of not having that responsibility at this time, but I do miss the companionship and bond that we form. Heck, the reason we got Gus was because a guy had these 2 pups left and told my daughter and her friend if they didn't take them he was taking them to the pound, so each girl took one, and the rest is history. I can't say we'll never get another one, who knows when the weather warms up I might not be able to get rid of the itch and end up getting one, but for now those are the reasons we haven't gotten another one
My buddy Gus had a left front amputation on April 7, 2010 and lived a great life until July 26,2010
Our first dog, Belle, was an only dog until she was 6. We lived in town with a normal yard, and Belle was an extraordinary dog, so we felt no need to have any companion but her. Truly, Belle was like an angel in dog fur (she did eat a $500 tent, but then it was all good 
).
When we decided to move into the mountains on some land, we knew our commutes to work would be considerably longer and we worried some about Belle being alone for so long. We then got a second dog from a local rescue group, a rotty cross about 9 months old. We were her 4th home and she was an awful lot of work. As with Duke's mom, bonding took a very long time. Belle and Zoot were fine together, but the humans just couldn't figure her out.
A few months after moving to the mountains, we found an old Collie in the woods. She was a mess. Long story short, she lived up here and was turned out and neglected terribly. Animal Control helped us convince her owner to legally sign her over to us. So then we had 3 dogs, including Sadie the 9-year-old, passive-aggressive Collie who soon went deaf.
Sadie was the first dog we lost, to kidney failure 5 years later. To be honest, her downhill slide was so sudden, so incredibly unexpected, that we had no prep time. We did not mourn Sadie with great sadness because she so suddenly was in great pain. When she died, we felt relief, honestly.
We never wanted 3 dogs, and being down to Zoot and Belle felt good. So 8 months later when we were on vacation in South Dakota and found a pup dumped in the middle of nowhere, we cringed. But we brought him home and named him Dakota. Back to 3 dogs.
Belle left next, after a few years of a slowly degenerative spinal disease taking her rear legs. Belle was so special that I worried for the last 2 years of her life that we were making her live for us, not for her. She's been gone 3 1/2 years and I'm getting tears now thinking of it. My husband would cradle her like a baby and carry her outside. I could never have predicted that he would be that way with her. Belle had a stroke one morning when I was helping her outside. She forced our hand. She was 15 1/2.
Losing Belle was so hard that I actually didn't want the other 2 dogs I had. Is that awful to say? I wanted nothing to do with caring for them, I didn't want to see them playing and wagging and leaning over for a head scratch. I wanted Belle, and if I couldn't have her then I didn't want any other. Of course I changed, but that was the hardest thing I've ever gone through.
Zoot left 14 months ago at about 13 1/2. The dog who wouldn't bond waited until her last year and then became a velcro dog. She took her entire life to develop a personality and then showed us she could be sweet and affectionate. But she was awfully hard to love.
Now we have Dakota with his 3 legs, and we have a 2-year-old bulldog, Evelyn. She comes from a privileged background and is our first non-rescue dog. She has a purpose, though.
So if we had not already had Dakota and Zoot when Belle died, I'm not sure we would have ever gotten another dog. I think that the once-in-a-lifetime dog can change you in ways that make it really hard to be open to another one. Like Dan is experiencing, when they leave it's hard to fathom another one. My parents lost their forever dog just before we lost Belle, and they've declared they will never get another, that there's no point since they think they would always be asking the new one to (unfairly) measure up.
Way too long, I know, but it's a complicated relationship that we enter into with these creatures.
--Shari
From abandoned puppy to Tripawd Warrior Dude, Dakota became one of the 2011 February Furballs due to STS. Our incredibly sweet friend lived with grace and dignity till he impulsively raced over the Bridge on 12-15-12.
Dakota's thoughtful and erudite blog is at http://shari.tr.....pawds.com/
Thank you all for the feedback.
Anyone else who has ever lost their "first dog" – whenever that may have been – is welcome to please share their feelings about if, how, and when they knew the time was right to get another dog. We'd especially like to hear about the emotional challenges anyone has faced coming to terms with the fact that you can never replace your first true canine soulmate.
Did you experience any feelings of guilt? Was there ever animosity toward the new dog? How did you overcome any regrets?
Tripawds Founders Jim and Rene
tripawds.com | tripawds.org | bemoredog.net | triday.pet
admin said:
Did you ever get another long, and how long did you wait?
If so, how did you know when the time was right?
If not yet, what is keeping you from doing so?
What were your biggest challenges to accepting the loss of your first?
What milestones to you recall marking the development of your connection with the new dog?
We lost our old guy nearly a year ago now (on the 26th) He was the first for both of us as far as losing a pet. We'd lost family pets, but he was ours, and it was hard.
We didn't wait long. We also had a second dog at the time he passed (still have her :)), and she was so lonely without our old guy. We had started looking, just to look and see what was out there. We had no intentions of bringing home a dog anytime soon, we just wanted to look - I think it helped us to look forward instead of focus on what was missing. But, then we came across two puppies, one with a missing leg - he needed us. We tried to walk away like we had with the others, but neither of us could stop thinking about the pups, and a few days later they both came home. We'd been looking for an older adult dog - not two puppies. But, we were drawn to those two and couldn't walk - so, a new chapter opened.
The biggest challenges in accepting the loss of our first I think was mostly just that he'd always been there. I met my other half and he had our old guy and he'd just been there from day one. They were a package. It was hard to look in the places he always slept, and not see him there. It was tough to see our other dog mourn. It was just tough to let go.
Adopting the puppies made it harder and easier for us. It was too soon, and a lot sooner than we'd hoped to bring home another dog. But we went with it. 2 puppies is so different than a 15 year old senior dog. They have definitely changed the atmosphere in our house from quiet and tranquil, to war zone 
. They made the emptiness much bigger - it was so much more obvious that our big guy was missing the first few weeks we had the pups. It was just so different than what we were used to. BUT having two puppies, going to school/working full time, doesn't leave much room to sit around and dwell. They kept us so busy that we didn't have time to focus and hang onto our grief for too long. Because two puppies are so different than one senior dog, we also have not ever compared or had unfair expectations. They weren't adopted to 'replace' or fill his spot. It's a completely new chapter for us.
As far as bonding - it's been difficult. I personally am not a fan of the puppy years as they're trying and a lot of work. I think puppies are difficult to bond with right away as it is, until they come into themselves and you get a better sense of their personality and potential. It's really been the last couple of months that we've bonded. Mina has forced a bond between us. She loves me like no other and would spend all day in my lap if she could. She and I have really connected so that's been really good. Dante and I still haven't bonded the way I'd like to. He's really taken with my other half and has become 'his dog' much like Mina is for me, but he's more aloof and more a 'one person' dog. Mina shares the love a little more than he does. We play and snuggle and all of that, but given the chance he'd rather be with my other half. It works, I can't fit two 50lb dogs in my lap anyways. I think it has really healed my S/O to have Dante become his buddy - the dog we lost had been with him since he was 15 and was his best friend - Dante has kind of filled those shoes now and I can tell it's helped my S/O to have Dante at his feet all night now. It's not the same, but it's made the emptiness a little less empty, now.
Cooper was actually our third new dog, after having lost our first love Ben. Ben was a doberman, he wasnt a tripawd but he was in need of rescue from our neighbor. Ben was 27 inches tall at the shoulder but only weighted 45 pounds at age 7 months. I bought him from the neighbor with nothing in mind but save this beautiful animal. Then realised what I had done and had to make the decision on keeping this beast... doberman hmmmm... only to find that dobermans are only what they are trained to be, and Ben lived with us for 14 years until he fell to congestive heart failure. I missed him so bad , but felt guilty about looking for a new dog, I very quickly started frequenting the no kill shelter web sites and found Gentle Ben - a doberman mix pup of about 4 months old, how coincidental.... we decided to drive to DesMoines to meet him - a 189 mile drive, when we got there Gentle Ben ran across the floor and leaped up onto my lap ( all 50 pounds of him) and began licking my face. Guess who made the trip back to Mount Pleasant with us? Yup. Well Gentle Ben left us suddenly 3 months later - he had some kind of bacterial infection that caused him to bleed out in his stomach, it was so fast there was no way to catch it in time, we asked the vet what the odds were that a littermate would have the same problem and he said a million in one , so we drove back and adopted Bens brother Kodi - because we felt we could at least have a part of Ben with us alive. Kodi lived with us for another 6 years and started having seizures... the vet was right a million in one of having the same problem , but pretty good odds of another... after battling seizures for 4 months Kodi went into seizures in January of 2007 and never came out. At that point I was ready to give up on dogs all together - and that was when my wife Faith wrote me the poem Message From God that we shared with the group back in October or November, it talked about me being chosen by God to care for the "broken dogs" that no one wanted. That was my inspiration to adopt Cooper from the same no kill shelter, he was 6 when we adopted him, he had skin problems another broken dog, but we came to love him so much, and as you all no he lost his left front leg to cancer in October 2010 and became a little more broken. Would I do any of it over again? No. How long and how do I know when the time is right? The time for me that is right - is when my home becomes empty of a beloved and cherished furkid... and I find another furkid that no one wants, maybe , probably a broken dog, and then I welcome him into our home knowing and expecting that no matter how short or long the time he is with us, that he will have a happy and wonderful home and know what it means to be loved and he will return that love with an unconditional love that will never replace the love lost when my other furkids left, but knowing it will help fill in the hole and because it is a new furkid it will be an entirely new and refreshing love, that I would totally miss out on had I not opened my heart and home to these broken dogs... this may not work for everyone , but it works for me, because yes - when I lose one it tears a hole in my heart that hurts beyond measure - but there are SO many loving and needy furkids out there , and not enough of us to help them. So yes - I will take a chance on the pain - and each new furkid lets me know when it is time.
Coopsdad/ Kenneth Blackburn
http://cooper.t.....ipawds.com
the monkeydogs only THINK they have invaded the tripawd state
Excellent. Thank you all for sharing your personal feelings on this tough subject. Keep 'em coming!
Tripawds Founders Jim and Rene
tripawds.com | tripawds.org | bemoredog.net | triday.pet
We always had a dog or two around when I was growing up, but Bo-dog was the first one that was mine. He was a150# newfi mix that I found in the neighborhood when he was a pup and I convinced my parents to let me keep him. He was the smartest, most protective, and most loyal dog I have ever been around. By the time he was 11 years old he was dealing with some type of degenerative muscle wasting disease that was making it hard for him to get around. We had lost family dogs before, and I'm sure I was sad when it happened but none really stand out. My parents always took them for that last ride to the vet.
I was broke when I moved back to the Bay Area with Bo in 1986 so I ended up living with my parents. Bo was not getting around well and my parents house had three stories. It became clear to me that he didn't have quality anymore so I decided it was his time. I didn't tell anyone or talk about it with anyone. I made a vet appointment and took him in by myself. I didn't want any help, he was my dog and I was going to handle it. Afterwards I walked into my parents house with his collar and leash and told them he was gone. My parents were upset because they didn't get to say good bye- and because I didn't let them help me. I always kept everything inside so I didn't let on to anyone how sad I was or how hard it had been to let him go. I couldn't even think about getting another dog, building a bond, and having to let go again like that. I know I did the right thing at the right time for Bo, but I always regretted that I was so selfish about making the decision alone.
That was 1986- I got Maggie as a 10 week old pug puppy in 1999. For some of those years my lifestyle kept me from a dog, not that I really wanted to try again, I was moving around, changing jobs. But in 1999 it seemed right, I was single, not in school anymore, and a companion sounded like a good idea. I wasn't going to get so attached again (I told myself). She was going to be a companion- keep me company, provide some laughs. When I first held her I was a gonner- I was totally attached right off the bat. She was very different from Bo- and not just in size. She had personality, she was obstinate, she was mischevious.
When Maggie was two I got 10 month old Tani from my uncle. Maggie hated her at first, but they grew inseparable after a couple of months. But I have never formed a bond with Tani like I had with Mag. Tani is a bit aloof, she does not like to be picked up, she does not like to be petted very much. Maybe because I got her a bit older- I don't know.
When Mag's prognosis after her amp was downgraded because of the lymph node involvement, and she was given 6 to 9 months I did start thinking about what I would do if I lost her as far as Tani is concerned. Tani had never in her life been an only pug. They were apart for 6 days when Mag had her surgery and Tani did not do well at all. She seemed depressed and was always looking for Mag. I didn't focus on losing Mag, and I didn't feel guilty for thinking about it what I would do if I did lose her. I think it is the practical part of me that plans ahead just a little. When it became clear last year that Maggie did not have too much time because of the second cancer I started talking to the local pug rescue people. I was clear that this was Maggie's time to spend with me- but I wanted to be ready to look out for Tani when the time came. Maybe I was planning because I had some control over it- everything with Mag seemed so out of my control, especially those last three months.
I adopted Obie about 5 weeks after I let Maggie go. I did not in any way intend to replace Mag- but Tani needed the company. Tani has been much happier with Obie around than when it was just the two of us. But I do think sometimes that having the pugs around makes me miss Mag more. I love Tani and Obie for who they are, but they are not her, and their different personalities remind me how much I lost when I lost Maggie. I don't feel guilty for feeling this way- its just how it is. You form different levels of bonds with all the people and animals in your life. It doesn't mean you love them less- its just different.
As far as my dog soul mate- it was Maggie. Bo was my first dog, but Maggie was 'the one'. I could write another book about why I feel this way about Mag.
Sorry this got really long- does it answer any of your questions?
Karen and the pugapalooza
Karen
krun15 said:
...does it answer any of your questions?
Yes, very much so. The more details the better, thank you!
Anypawdy else care to share how they coped with the loss of their "soul dog" – whether or not he or she was your first dog – with any emotional or logistical challenges you overcame when transitioning to welcome another dog into your life?
Tripawds Founders Jim and Rene
tripawds.com | tripawds.org | bemoredog.net | triday.pet
Wow...thank you so much for this topic...I cannot get over its timeliness for our family. March 1st will mark 5 months since we lost Chance, and today, we visited a Mingle with Our Mutts event at a local
shelter and filled out an application to adopt a two month old
shepherd/lab mix. I logged onto Tripawds to look up info on 'feeding raw' and the first forum I saw was this topic...
While I grew up with dogs and always felt attached to them and mourned for them when they passed, Chance was my 'first dog' as an adult and the connection was so much deeper than with my childhood dogs. Though he was 'the family dog' (my husband and I adopted him when he was about 8 months old), Chance and I had an especially close bond...perhaps because he and I were always together when my husband was away for military deployments or trainings. Chance was our first 'child' and he proved how special he was when our two-legged children came along. 🙂 Words cannot explain what I felt when we had to let him go, but I also know that with this community, the words are not neccessary.
I could not imagine wanting another dog, but at the same time, we all missed the companionship of a
dog.
Today was a very emotional day. Looking at all of the sweet faces that need a home was heart wrenching. Playing with the pup and contemplating the adoption brought the tears, because bringing her home would be the beginning of a new 'era'. Our life with her will be so much different than our life with Chance, because we are at a different place in our lives...because this pup is a baby, while Chance was a 'senior.' Bringing her home will be, for me, the moment of 'accepting' that we are moving on.
How do I know its the right time? I don't...but I also know something in our house feels 'incomplete' without a canine companion. I am beginning to feel open to loving a new dog for his or her personality and not because he or she reminds me of Chance. While I cannot imagine another dog replacing Chance as 'the one' for me, I do feel another dog will help fill a void for all of us.
As during Chance's battle with cancer, Tripawds has once again provided answers when I needed them, so thank you...and I will provide an update if we welcome a new family member later this week!
Chance, our 9.5 year old Rottie/Shepherd mix was diagnosed with Osteosarcoma in his left front shoulder. In July of 2010, we planned to proceed with the amputation, but lung mets were discovered. Chance reached the Rainbow Bridge October 1, 2010, just a few weeks after his 10th birthday.
http://www.figh.....ipawds.com
chancemom5 said:
Tripawds has once again provided answers when I needed them...
Thank you. This topic is long overdue, looking forward to gaining more insight from others.
Tripawds Founders Jim and Rene
tripawds.com | tripawds.org | bemoredog.net | triday.pet
Wow. If you got those kind of responses from the others, you better get ready for several pages from me (being verbose on the forums, you know). And of course you know this topic is relevant to my recent encounters with rescue pups, either in person or on the web.
Let's go back a few years, to 2001. My first dog that I had as an adult, Orko, made it to his 16th birthday (have you noticed how many of our dogs end up departing on a birthday - I have noticed that again and again on this site and it happened for both of mine - we must just coax them to make it that far.) That was rough. Yes, he was my soulmate (but I also felt that way about a dog I had from age 9 to 19). Nevertheless, Orko was sort of like you describe Jerry. People of all sorts idolized him - dog on campus - man about town - strong, blond, stoic, handsome . . . gentle giant.
About one year later, I looked at a rescue site. I met a lovely dog, who had a reputation for running if the door was cracked. I hesitated (was busy teaching for the very first time) and called the people back a few months later. They wondered why I waited, and in the meantime the dog had developed cancer. No longer an option.
A few months later, I checked out dogs at the shelters. When I saw Tazzie, big and 1&1/2 yrs old, he was rolled over on his back with three little dogs chewing on his face. That was it, so I took him on a "trial". Yeah, right, a trial. (well he was trying!)
Still, I did not bond quickly with him. I think we finally bonded when he (or maybe it was me) nearly killed himself with an Advil overdose, which of course led to a very harrowing few weeks (it was badly managed by the vet the weekend it happened). Can you imagine bumping off your new pup 6 weeks after he arrives in the house? Gees. Thank goodness we turned things around for the better then.
So, 8 years later and Tazzie has departed, and I'd say he turned into as much a soul-mate as was Orko. More? Less? I don't know.
Reasons to hesitate to get a new dog?
- I don't like the fact that there will be some dimming of the memory of Tazzie. I know that happened when Tazzie took over from Orko, so pretty sure it will happen again. I look at Orko's picture, and I can't say I remember him as vividly
as I should. The same thing goes for a wonderful dog I had as a child. I
find that weird and sad and not sure about the implications.
- The cancer battle was of course intense, as you all know. The idea of problems developing is scary. One pyre cross that caught my eye did make me think how she just looks like she might be at risk.
- It is one thing to accept a dog passing when they live out a reasonable natural life span. It is another when they are cut down in their prime, or even before, as so many of our OSA dogs are.
- Along with fear of health issues, is the fact that every moment was caught up in looking after Tazzie during those four post amp months (we did not have a smooth ride, given mets showed up early). I admit to feeling that I don't want to have to rush home at noon or right after work - I have never been one to let a dog stay alone any longer than necessary so it seems a bit of a trade-off between dog-life and other life. I am guessing that the intensity of the last few months makes me think the work is more than it actually will be. The intensity of the last few months definitely makes everything feel fresh, even though it is over a year later now.
- I know that I just hated it when people would ask, as so many did as soon as
Tazzie passed, whether I'd get a new dog, meaning within the next week or two. It was all I could do to bite
my tongue to ask whether they'd go out and make or adopt a new kid if
he/she happened to get sick and die. I hope I haven't offended anyone, for I know how horrible that comment would be to someone with a child who was sick. I did not appreciate their question either!
All in all, a 1&1/2 yr wait seemed okay the last time around, and probably would be about right this time, although it might happen sooner since the wheels have started to turn. (The honey-coloured pyre-newf (who knows, really) I met has been at rescue for over a year. We need to see how she does with a certain cat for the rescue place seems to think that might be a bad match.)
What a great topic…it touches on thoughts I've been having since losing Zack 2 months ago.
When I first got married, my husband & I knew we wanted a dog. As soon as we were settled and living in a place that allowed dogs, we adopted Zack from a no-kill shelter. His entire litter had been brought in the night before, and, really, he chose us (even at only 5 weeks old, he was pretty smart!) Whatever I say about him will never do him justice – he was the most adorable, loyal, persistent, lovable, 'one-track-minded,' neurotic, sweetest, intelligent 'baby,' and we grew up together (he from puppy to dog, and us from 'crazy kids' to adults.) He adapted to one long-distance and several short-distance moves, was my one constant as I divorced, and helped 'seal the deal' with my new husband (heeheehee – we joke about this, but on some level, I really believe it is true – here's this dog with such a personality, how do you walk away from that? 🙂
Zack truly was my dog soulmate – I knew him as well as I knew myself and vice versa. I could tell what he was thinking from the look on his face or what he needed from the tone of his whine/bark, and he knew when I needed a snuggle or a kiss without me having to ask. When he was about 3 or 4, I saw an interview with the bassist from the Red Hot Chili Peppers – he had his young daughter with him, and the interview ended with him saying, 'There's only one Clara!' and her responding with, 'There's only one Poppa!' It was so cute, and immediately made it into our vocabulary – I can't tell you the number of times over the years I have said to him, 'There's only one Zackie!' (with my husband often responding on Zack's behalf with, 'There's only one Momma!')
And that became so evident after we adopted our 2nd dog, Izzy. The adoption came about because I was driving to work one day & found a boxer puppy. I took it to the SPCA, and decided we'd adopt it if no one claimed it in three days. Well, Zack was never a dog's dog (he always thought of himself more as a person), and at age 11, he wasn't about to change. We introduced him to several puppies, who drove him nuts within seconds of meeting, and we were about to give up when one of the shelter volunteers suggested Izzy. She had just been brought back to the shelter by her adoptive dad because he was single & had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and could no longer care for her. About 8 months prior to that, she had been on a waiting list (for which I didn't ask for the details because it would have broken my heart.) I didn't necessarily want an older dog, but as soon as she & Zack met, I knew she'd fit in perfectly – just like him, she was way more interested in people than other dogs. And fit in she did…..she is mostly deaf, and learned our routines from Zack. And, thank god, because while she is a good dog – sweet, low-key – she is not very bright (at least compared to Zack.) It took her several months to truly trust us and warm up, but she was a wonderful addition to our family.
Dog #3 came into our lives only as a result of losing Zack. A few days before we ended up losing him, I saw the post from Craigslist here on tripawds. She was so cute in the pictures, and I felt a bond due to her only having 3 legs – and she was only about 90 mins away. The very night Zack died (although we had no idea it was coming), my husband & I were out getting a pizza, and I remember saying to him, 'Tell me again why we can't have 3 dogs?' I full well knew we couldn't, but wanted to hear it said out loud. We got home that night and ending up having to rush Zack to the emergency clinic, and return home without him.
And, even as I was dealing with this incredible void without Zack, my mind kept wandering to this poor 3-legged puppy – the timing felt uncanny. It took a few weeks for us to feel ready to even start discussing another dog, but knowing time might be limited to adopt, and thinking about her living somewhere unwanted, we contacted the shelter, and adopted Zula in mid-Jan. She is only about 8 months old, and is ALL puppy. My husband has never raised a puppy, and I was 14 years younger last time I did it, so it has definitely been an adjustment. She is a pit bull mix, but mostly pit bull, so very strong-willed. Zack was a lab mix, with some pit bull in him (as a puppy, he looked just like a pittie, until his snout grew out to resemble lab more…), and the similarities between them are amazing. Some of her personality traits and mannerisms remind us so much of Zack, we joke that he is whispering in her ear and giving her pointers. Despite the stubbornness, she is so cute, sweet, smart, and cuddly, it makes it easy to love her. While I don't regret adopting so soon after losing Zack (especially because Zula really needed a forever family to belong to) there have been a few times when I have felt guilty that maybe I didn't mourn the loss of Zack long enough (which the logical part of me knows is silly because I still miss him & remember him despite, and sometimes even more because of, the new dog.)
All of that being said, for me, I do not feel the same kind of feelings for either of my current dogs that I did for Zack. I love them to pieces, but he was 'my boy.' We shared a connection that felt deeper than love (if that makes sense) and I don't think I will ever feel that with another dog. And, I am ok with that – the other dogs remind me of how special my bond with Zack was and how lucky I was to share 14 years with him. Everything after that is just gravy.
Zack, King of Dogs, 1996 to 2010
Zack lived a full 14 years, even to the end.
The joy and memories he provided us will last a lifetime.
Surviving him is his sister, Izzy, a 12-year-old boxer mix quadpawd.
And the latest addition, Zula, an 11-month-old pit bull mix tripawd.
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