Caring for a Three Legged Dog or Cat
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I'm sorry, this is only indirectly related to this forum -- I hope it's ok if I kind of vent here. (If this is not appropriate, Admin, please feel free to delete this thread.)
I unfortunately have a tendency to fume and obsess when people are being jerks towards me or my family, even about stupid stuff, and I've gotten worse the last few months. Percy is so tuned in to me that when I fume, he worries. The last thing I want to do at this time is make him worry, or to waste time fuming about unimportant things.
We live in a fairly nice neighborhood -- nice enough where some people spend money to have their bushes regularly trimmed into unnatural shapes. Unfortunately the house across the street is a rental and the renters have pretty much trashed the place. They also don't care about their neighbor's yards, and have been using our front yard as a driveway to help them back in their moving trucks into their driveway. Every few months, they pull a budget type rental in and out of their drive all night long. I called the police once when they left a ton of tire tracks in our front yard and they agreed to pay to fix the ruts. I had a feeling that they might do it again, just to spite us, and today as I was walking Percy, I noticed new tire tracks in our yard and have been fuming all evening about it.
I know that this is so, so insignificant, and I hate that it bothers me so much when people are jerks, but I can't seem to let things go. This is not the time when I should be reacting to things like this -- Percy needs me to be happy -- but I think I've been flying off the handle even more quickly lately.
Does anyone have any good secrets about how to let things go? I don't want to waste this precious time with Percy thinking about things like the jerks across the street.
Thanks,
AJ
Vent all you want! That's what this forum is for.
As for letting go? Free yourself of guilt and blame. How? Ask yourself at any given moment, is this how I wish to feel? If not, realize that only you have the power to change it. Eckhart Tolle calls it Being. Jon Kabat-Zinn refers to it as mindfulness, and suggests dancing with the actuality of events you have no control over. Befriending your breath helps too. If all else fails try EFT or NLP, but ya gotta believe.
During one particular time when I was having difficulty controlling my reactionary emotions, I wrote this which describe what I went through and what I'm referring to above. Follow the links in that post to some helpful books and tools for letting go. It's no Secret. 
Tripawds Founders Jim and Rene
tripawds.com | tripawds.org | bemoredog.net | triday.pet
I found myself being short tempered when Tate was diagnosed as well, and having that right in your face every day would wear thin quickly. Weird neighbors abound. My neighbors practically throw up if Tate poops on their grass, Mr. chased Tate with a rake one time with every intention of beating my little boy with it.
But I digress. It always makes me feel better picturing that person on Judgment Day trying to explain to the God of the universe why they were so mean and stupid on this earth. Ha! Revenge belongs to the Lord! The wrath of God! Then I even feel kinda sorry for them, bumbling through life being an idiot. But if you're not religious, that won't really help.
I'd put the landlord on the hot seat, make it his problem instead of yours. Then you can be all sweet to their face and let him do the dirty work. Do they bother anyone else? I guarantee, the owner of that property just wants quiet tenants that don't cause trouble and pay their rent on time. Irate phone calls from neighbors will make him think twice before renewing their lease.
http://tate.tripawds.com/
August 16, 2006 to November 28, 2011
TATE ~ Forever in our hearts.
I like tire tracks in our front yard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Way to go neighbors!!!
Bwhahahhahahhahahahahahhahahahahaaaa!
Monkeydogs RULE!!!!
What are they doing pulling a moving van in and out of their driveway in the middle of the night... monthly? Something smells fishy.
Drive some nails through a board and stick them in your yard... nail side up.
Hi AJ,
I can relate to being totally annoyed at neighbors. Here is the story first: My Chloe had her amputation 2 weeks before I had to move 350 mi away to start grad school. I was with her those 2 weeks everyday and missed her very much when I had to leave her. I knew it would only be 5 weeks until she was able to move up with me (wanted her to more fully recover before uprooting her from my parents house and moving so far away so soon after a life changing surgery). So after she moved up I was unsure about her being locked in the house for 9 hours a day 2 days a week while I was in class (not able to go home because I was commuting). We had a nice big yard, so I ended up leaving her outside since she was previously an outdoor dog.
Here's where the neighbors come in. A week after her first 2 times outside, I get a visit from Animal Control. They said that there was a report of a dog left for days on end without food and water at this house. My jaw dropped to the floor. Not only was my dog inside the house with ME 5 days a week all day long, but when I did have to put her outside I left ample food and water and shelter (nice big dog house with fuzzy blanket inside). The AC officer knew that the call was "not right" since my smiling happy dog was inside with me, toys strewn everywhere and she did not cower at the sight of humans. I showed the AC officer around the house and it saved me a trip to get her new dog license since I was able to purchase one on the spot.
THEN I get a notice in the mail not 5 days later saying that my dog was making excessive noise. Mind you at this point she had only been outside a total of 4 times. Yes the latter notice probably did have some merit, but I was so annoyed at my neighbors for not having the consideration to TELL ME FIRST or ASK what was going on. But in the end it worked out since I was able to start taking her to lab with me (drop her off at a friends house with a dog not 2 minutes from campus) away from the mean people. I recently moved and now I live in the house she is used to staying at all day.
Now that I have written an essay, my advice? Maybe a better solution will work itself out like it did for Chloe and I. I also had to tell myself over and over and over (like 50+ times) that its not worth getting mad over because they are never going to change and I should just hope karma gets them in the end. And if that doesn't work, I also like the idea someone said above about setting a wooden board nail trap in your yard. Or maybe you could get some sort of motion detector with an alarm for your yard and if they trip it with their vehicle encroaching on your property it would go off and scare the bejeebers out of them.
Good Luck!
-Nicole
Chloe became a rear amp tripawd on 7-29-10. Another tumor was removed on front leg 2-20-14. Found 3rd tumor on neck 2-2015, but she's still kicking cancer's butt at age 14. Chloe's blog
jewels said:
Drive some nails through a board and stick them in your yard... nail side up.
Jewels...I like the way you think!
Bless you, AJ. It's nice to know I'm not the only one who obsesses too much about rotten neighbors. We should start a support group. We just gotta try to not give them the power to bug us... and call the authorities when appropriate so they don't get away with any crap 
Gerry has been a tripawd since 12/16/2009.
He was a shelter dog with a mysterious past and an irrepairable knee injury.
Videos and pics of Gerry's pawesomeness can be found at: http://gerry.tripawds.com
Hi everyone,
Thanks for your replies. While I don't wish rotten neighbors on anyone, it's nice to know it's not just me.
Admin, that was a great blog post you pointed me to. That's exactly the problem I have — I'm the type that's more likely to let the dent in the truck overshadow a beautiful campsite than vice versa. At least I do recognize that this is a problem. But this mind-over-emotional-reaction thing is hard to reach. It particularly bugs me when people are purposely being rude, inconsiderate, or just plain jerks. Thanks for the links, I will take a look at those.
I know I can have the power not to let people like that bug me — I'm just trying to figure out how to achieve that. With Percy being sick and our time together limited, it has suddenly become very important for me to learn how to deal with this. Unfortunately, I've not been very good at it in the past.
Tatespeeps, Chloe's mom, and GerrysMom, sorry you all have had to deal with rotten neighbors too. That's got to be hard when your neighbors are not dog people. Luckily most of my other neighbors (except the nut jobs across the street) are dog people, so at least they don't complain about Percy. Tatespeeps, I like your suggestion about calling the landlord. I will try that…although she's a bit strange too (I'll explain below).
Jewels, I like the way you think too! 🙂 Hmmm…something to think about!
Fishy is right! The rest of our neighbors are very nice and slightly nosy and we've all speculated about what exactly these people are doing…are they the mob, drug smuggling, human trafficking? Maybe Monkeybutt trafficking? Every few weeks, they will bring a budget type moving truck and a crew of probably illegal aliens and spend all night backing the truck in right up to the garage, then driving it away, then back up to the garage, over and over. We have no idea what they are putting in or taking out of the truck. The truck sits in the driveway untouched during the day and then the next night they are at it again. This goes on for a night or two, then we don't see the truck any more for a few weeks until the next nightly move. Just as strange…this is actually the "second" time these people have been living in this house. A year or so ago they were living there, and doing the midnight truck runs, when all of sudden one night they just up and disappeared. We got up one day and the house was empty and all of the windows were left open. One of the other neighbors called the landlord to let her know. We thought she'd at least come an close the windows to protect the house, but she did not seem to do anything. The windows to the house were simply left open for months until a few months ago when the moving truck and the same people suddenly reappeared and moved back in again. Back before the first tire rut incident, they told me that they were relatives of the landlord. But when I happened to talk to the landlord once and said something about that, she said that they were not related (I would deny being related to them too!). Just an all around weird situation. And all of this is going on in suburban, slightly old-south, slighty yuppy neighborhood. Very weird and out of place.
Oh, and I almost forgot. The first time they lived there, they kept a rooster in the backyard. In the middle of suburban Florida. So every once in a while throughout the day we'd here the rooster crow. He wasn't very loud, and was actually quieter than the wild peacocks that roam the neighborhood, but I think one of the neighbors complained because after a while we stopped hearing the crowing.
Wow! This is bringing out the Nancy Drew in me (just gave away my age I guess!). I would let the police know the odd behavior. Maybe they will set up a sting operation! I also had a neighbor send animal control to my house once. We were remodeling our house built in 1810-really needed it! We moved to our summer cottage for 3 months. The cottage is 600 square feet. 2 small bedrooms, kitchen living area and one bath. There were 5 peeps and 3 dogs, Coop, out bichon Snowy and my Tibetan Terrier Bailey. Our neighbors owned 2 camps on either side of me and would cross our lawn to get from one to the other. This would get the dogs barking. They complained to Animal Control that the dogs were left outside (never, they are indoor dogs unless we are outside) and barking uncontrollably. Now, they caused the barking by continually walking along our beach are (which is 20 feet from the cottage) and they denied they called the Animal Control! We were only there for 3 freakin' months before we moved back into the house. They knew it was temporary. And a difficult situation with such a small place for 8 beings! Just wanted to share a similar story. I have a hard time letting go also, but am learning day by day. Good luck!!
mck025 said:
I know I can have the power
Correction: You do have the power. Believe it and you will. 
Tripawds Founders Jim and Rene
tripawds.com | tripawds.org | bemoredog.net | triday.pet
admin said:
Correction: You do have the power. Believe it and you will.
I am really working on it 🙂 Sometimes it works, but other times the fuming comes back.
kyoule said:
Now, they caused the barking by continually walking along our beach are (which is 20 feet from the cottage) and they denied they called the Animal Control! We were only there for 3 freakin' months before we moved back into the house. They knew it was temporary. And a difficult situation with such a small place for 8 beings! Just wanted to share a similar story. I have a hard time letting go also, but am learning day by day. Good luck!!
That just doesn't make sense. So they have the power to stop the barking, but instead they keep causing it and then complain. People can be so infuriating sometimes! Luckily we have our dogs to show us how to get along.
Wow, 8 of you in 600 square feet! That must have been close quarters!
I have a bad neighbor story too, so I know how you feel. Now, we have calmed the waters and are cordial and somewhat respectful of each other, AFTER 10 YEARS! Before, my neighbor thought my dogs were taking dumps in his yard, even though my dogs are behind a fence and never get out. His dogs are not behind a fence but he has taught them to take their potty breaks in other neighbors yards. So... He started bringing the poop down to my house and throwing it in my driveway.
One day I busted him "red handed" so he explained why he was doing it. His words were so obtuse that it pissed me off enough that I picked up the poop and threw it at him. Yes, it was a bare handed deal, but I do have a temper. So he picked it up and threw it back and hit me in the head with it. So, I ran and got some of my mastiff poo, and started hurling it into his yard.
Needless to say, it was an embarrassing lack of control that led to an all out poop fight. This was the same neighbor I was going to home group with (a church function). My husband was very angry about it all and it led to a red-necked confrontation in our front yard. The neighbor, his 3 boys, against my husband and me. I had police on the phone but it took them 25 minutes to get there. He threatened to come down after they left and get me and my husband.
Years have gone by since then, now we mow each others yard and look out for one another. It has taken alot to become this friendly. I had to learn to control my temper because my husband will get in trouble looking out for me, and vice versa. I still don't like them much, but I had to find the inner voice that said it isn't up to me to change them. They were driving on our lawn to in the heat of things, big donuts in our front yard with their jacked up old pick ups.
I credit them with teaching me patience.
Elizabeth
Diagnosed with osteosarcoma in the right front leg 8/23/10,
leg fractured 8/27/10,
leg amputated 8/30/10
http://sammyand.....pawds.com/
I couldn't begin to say how special Sammy is to us. Living and laughing with and loving this wonderful boy is priceless.
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