I got Tanner 2 weeks after I lost my Jake. Jake had been with me for 12 years and when he passed away I told my family we were never ever getting another dog b/c my heart was just completely broken. For those two weeks it was really hard to come home to my quiet house. The quietness was almost too much to bare. I couldn't stand it and someone posted the poem about a dogs last will and testament; and, I knew that I could never ever not come home to a dog ever again.  At first I felt guilty but Christine on here said that when it's it turn she wants to be greeted at the bridge by a ton of slobbery wet kisses and I have thought about that ever since b/c that's exactly what I want too! I didn't expect Tanner to be like Jake, and actually he is the complete opposite. I personally think that helped me, that he was SO different because I didn't want to feel like I was trying to replace him. Lily WILL send you the right pup, everyone here believes in that. I just adopted another dog too and I know my Jake sent him too. Both my Jake and Roscoe are about 2-3 years old and they have bonded so well with my family. I don't think the age of the dog really matters, they WILL bond with you. Maybe you can go to your local SPCA and walk around, see if any of the dogs seem to have a connection with you or your kids. I hate to be so cliche but you will know when you find him/her. None of us know when it's our time or what's going to take us, the same with our pups....grief is the price we pay for great love and any dog is guaranteed to bring you great love! 

Time for getting a new pup is so very different for everyone, like the others have already said......I am one of those dog moms that always has 2 dogs at a time, for many reasons. However, the loss of my Polly a year ago, was so beyond difficult, I decided I didn't want a second dog anymore, or get another yellow Lab again for that matter. Fast forward a year, I have added a new yellow Lab pup to my life that came along, and I am once again a happy 2-dog mom, already having my sweet 2 year old black Lab Pearl. I will never stop missing my Polly, ever, or my other Lab girls that have left me for that matter, but I can be happy again. Just takes some time.

In answering a few of your questions, yes, I have made the mistake of comparing a new pup to a beloved dog that I had lost a few months prior, many years ago....for me, I should have waited a bit longer to get a new pup, and finish my grieving process. And I know what you are feeling in regard to Goldens being a cancer-magnet... Labs are as well, and all my previous Labs have died of cancer, the last 2 including my Polly died within 2 1/2 years from the same ugly cancer, hemangiosarcoma, but I am NOT going to let that scare me from getting Labs again, I refuse to let canine cancer win. Lastly, you said the perfect thing, be patient, and Lily WILL send you that special pup, and definitely a Golden.

My only advice, is making sure ALL hearts in the family are ready..... that makes it much easier to open your heart back up to bring a new pup/dog home to start a new, happy, life-journey with him/her. When I got my new pup, Zuzu, I knew my heart was ready.

Bonnie, Angel Polly, and new crew

Yep, totally agree with all of the above. I still had 2 when I lost my TY Guy. I was ready before my husband was. Funny thing is Daryl is more his dog than mine. Although, he is starting to realize that I am around. LOL Is he TY? No. Do I want him to be? Not at all. Ty was one of a kind. Does not mean I can't love another pup. There will just never be one exactly like TY. He had so many little quirks that just made him, him. I too was a bit afraid of the comparison stuff. Well to start with, Ty sent us a Black Lab mix exactly half his size. He does not steal shoes or dig out the trash. He does however, have that lab lean. May be just that he is trying to balance himself. Yep, Ty sent me another Tripawd. I was not planning this at all. I was looking on Petfinder for Lab puppies and this 2 year old popped up. I knew it was meant to be. You will know too! Everyone's timing is different. Kids make the decision a bit easier. They a can be persistent when they want a pet. Maybe they can help with picking it out. I will say, my 12 year old Border Collie mix was gotten because of my kid's begging. One of the best decisions I ever let them talk me into. Hugs, Lori, Ty & the gang

benny55 said

You are just beginning to open your heart. Try not and think about anything other than being open to having another dog in your life. The right one will come at the right time. What is the saying.."It may not be the dog you want...but it will be the one you need"! Just ask ALISON!

TRUTH!!!! However at this point, I no longer wish to trade little Jasper for Shelby... my world would be the most amazing place if time could stand still and I could have them both! They would be the best of friends and their antics would keep me smiling day in and day out! 

Much love!

benny55 said

But those of you who just have ONE dog......can't wait to see pictures of your second dog!!! The lpve multiples!! It's a beautiful thing!!

hahaha, I agree!!!! 

When I lost my poodle to lymphoma, It took me about 2 months to really be ready to have a dog.  There were other dogs in the house but Bear had picked me and losing him was tough.  Next was my Scottie Otis.  I didn't think he would handle apartment life well since he had always been on a farm so he stayed with my parents when I left home.  He passed from HSA.  By then, I already had my first greyhound, Miss Kitty.  When she was 10, we added an 8 year old hound, Reko Toughie.  Toughie died of acute liver failure and I was crushed.  For the first time in my life, I could afford pretty much any vet care he needed and there was nothing that could be done.  That just ripped me apart.  Kitty and I mourned very hard for a week.  Just layed in bed the entire time.  When I returned to work (I had already taken the week off prior to his death to go see family.), Kitty lost her mind and couldn't handle being alone.  It was one of the few times both my husband and I worked out of the home and she was alone from about 8:30 AM to 4:00 PM.  I was not ready for another dog but she said she needed one.  So Nixon came into our life. 

The dogs took to each other immediately.  My husband took to Nixon immediately.  Toughie didn't like him so my husband liked having a dog who liked him.  It took me a few months to really enjoy him.  Now, my husband is jealous of the attention I give Nixon. 

Two years later, we lost Kitty to osteosarcoma.  At this point, I had read the poems, I was a little more prepared for losing her since she was 14 years old.  We waited a week before we went to go find Nixon a friend.  He needed that time to mourn.  Adopting a greyhound takes some time but we picked the Cookie Monster out that weekend.  We lost Kitty on August 15 and Cookie came home Labor Day weekend.  I was much more prepared to love this time around. 

We already had her tag collar ready to go with her tags on it when we went to pick her up.  We made a production of putting her tag collar on and telling her that she was joining our pack now and was going to be with us forever.  She just slipped right into our home life like she'd always been here.  We also knew more of what to do with a new dog in the house as it was our 4th time bringing someone home.  She has learned some of Kitty's behaviors but she is so unlike Kitty.  Kitty was a master manipulator and had a very high EQ.  Cookie is a very smart dog but doesn't quite have the whole manipulation/train your human thing that Kitty did. Nixon actually picked up those traits. 

All I can say is trust your gut.  Bringing a dog home too soon can be very stressful on all of you.  Putting any expectations on the dog to be just like the previous dog won't help.  I've had this problem with my horse.  I had an incredible bond with my first horse and even though he was 37 when he died, it crushed me.  I've had my third horse now for 15 years.  It took until this past year for me to let go and accept her for her and not compare her to how perfect he was.  She's amazing in her own right and I was too blind to see it.