I read your post about Shadow and was sad to see you had experienced the same thing I did on July 21st, not with my 3-legged, Comet but with her soul mate and companion, Rugby.  I thought you might find comfort in knowing what I experienced with Rugby because I was with him.  

He was a healthy, happy 8 year old shep mix boy we got for Comet as a puppy.   I felt so blessed because Comet, being 3 legged is always in and out of the vet and my nerves have turned into panic attacks over the worry I always have for her.  Rugby was a rock.  He was normal and he adored Comet. I loved him dearly for that alone.

The morning started off normal as can be.  We all three did our normal routine which was to go on the back porch and exercise.  I would get on a step machine and toss them Cheerios while I worked out.  They loved this. Comet would lay on lounge pad and Rugby would run around in the yard scaring off birds in the trees. When I was done working out, we all went in the house in which I always passed out a little cookie.  I handed them both one without looking and Rugby didn't take his, he looked at it.  I was taken aback since he was a food-addict.   I watched him walk away and his legs seemed gimpy.  I tried to get him to lay beside me in one of the gazillion beds that we have down for Comet, but he'd just pop up.   He always followed me, so I tested him and went into another room in which he followed slowly.  But he came back to the den and started wanting to go behind the dinette – which is so odd.  He then just laid on his side.  I knew I had to go the vet, thinking he had eaten something bad.  I decided to go upstairs and get dressed enough to go to the vet and if he followed me (which he always did), I wouldn't take him.  He hadn't even moved when I came back downstairs.

I then rushed him to the vet. I was surprised that Comet let me get out of the house with him without fussing to go with us. In the car he hardly moved.  And for him to not carrying on like a nut in the car really scared me.

When we got the vet, he wanted to just lay on his side. He really looked comatose to me.  He is normally out of control happy. He vomited waiting for the vet and I was happy just to see him get up.  I was thinking it was his stomach because it was now swollen.  The vet noticed the pale gums, the fluid in his stomach and wanted to run tests.  I left him because he loved to be around people and I was feeling relieved that he vomited and all would be better. The vet called and he wanted to put an IV in him and said, he couldn't get the machine to read his blood right.  And the x rays looked pretty normal – maybe his heart was a little big – but not a concern.  I  told the vet to do whatever it takes.  25 minutes later my vet called and Rugby had coded.  My vet was right there and worked on him for 20 minutes. My vet wondered if it was a black widow bite. 

The shock and horror was almost too much to bare. How could he be normal at 730am and dead at 1130am? How could my world and Comet's world turn so dreadful in 3 hours?  My husband, Comet and I went to vet once we could compose ourselves.  We had to take Comet so she was understand why I was so hysterical and to see him once more.  She is so sensitive.

We said our good-byes. Comet smelled his nose and inside his ears.  She, I believe knew early on.  She had started urinating over his urine, which I found strange.  

I wanted the autopsy because I needed to know.  It only took my vet 20 minutes to call me to tell me it was a cancerous heart tumor that burst. His heart couldn't pump anymore with the heart sac full of blood.  He reassured me it would have never been detected since they grow so fast, probably in 2 months plus he was a healthy seeming dog.  In October he had had all of his wellness tests.

Knowing what I do now, I am lucky it happened this way…quick with no suffering. He would have died anyway even if we had known. I personally believe he was in a comatose state when he went down.  He didn't react to his surroundings.  I think his mind drifted away before his body did.  He wasn't scared. He didn't even need me.  And he could be a big baby when he got a little hurt or even just teeth cleanings.

Comet needed him so much.  She has so many emotional and physical problems.  She is a small corgi/lab mix born with a deformed front leg.  She was rescued from a hoarder home in which 22 dogs were found. Most were put down because they were in such bad shape.  She wasn't.  She is terrified of everything outside of her safe zones and reacts badly.  She's adorable in her surroundings.  I;m sure people don't understand why I would tolerate such a growly dog.  No one can touch her.  But she is just that scared and full of personality when she is secure. Needless to say, I'm super crazy protective of her and so was Rugby.  I took for him for granted because the focus was always on Comet.  He just took it in stride and was always happy trying to show her to not be so scared of everything.  He loved to make her laugh and teased her constantly, even at 8 years old.  Oh sure, he'd be annoying but he never scared her. He knew the right mix on how to make her happy.  He didn't mind letting her be our world, she became his world, too.

As special as I have always thought Comet was, I have come to realize – it was Rugby who was more special.  He had a gift for dealing with a special needs dog.  He had understood the need for making Comet's world safe and happy. Unfortunately, I think this is the beginning of the end with Comet.  She is 11 and her world is shattered.  I'm afraid depression will overcome her.  It seems to be.  I can't make her happy as hard as I'm trying.

Sorry, I didn't mean to make this so long. But how do you write a short message about someone that meant so much?

…thank you for listening