I just sent this to Mary/Cemil:

"I am beside myself right now.  I got up at 2am for his feeding and the bed was so empty.  And again at 6am.  Getting dressed and nobody to throw my PJ's at and watch him happily roll in them.  And Betty begged for her morning chew, but Raven's bone is just there, sitting on the shelf.  He would always hop to the cabinets and stare at it and then at me…just yesterday…  And I had meat thawing for his meals today, with nobody to give it to.  And when I went out to feed Billy, the dogs would both crowd to the door to go outside to eat their messy hardboiled egg treats, but Betty was alone.  I could still see the shells on the ground from yesterday's egg that he ate.  Even sitting at the computer, he's not at my feet as my foot warmer, I would reach down and just stroke his face with my fingertips as I would wait for my slow computer sometimes.  Just an empty floor."

The night before last, I ran across this video and was planning on posting it to this forum.  It's about a man with osteosarcoma, an amputee, and seems that lung mets took him suddenly months later.  Toby Keith wrote this song for him.  I thought it was beautiful and wanted to share with all of you, at the time, Raven was softly snoozing at my feet in what I didn't realize was the last night of his life on earth.  Now, I'm finally getting to sharing this video and it has a whole new meaning to me. 

Thank you to everyone for all the thoughts and prayers and comforting words.  I have so much to say, but can't bring myself to just now.  More later.

Dawn