jerry said

mil0mum2006 said
I don't what I should be doing at this point, because I can't keep calling the vet every day giving them a daily update.  I know that I need to think of the realization that I will have to make that crappy decision.  But when do you know when it's the right time??  Every time I try to talk to my husband about it - he doesn't want to talk about it.  

I love my dog a great deal and have gone into financial burden to get his amputation done.  But I feel that I can't afford to keep trying to cure something that will NEVER go away.  How do I bring up the hospice aspect to my husband without starting a fight or just getting him to think about it, since we will have to go through soon.   I think that he might be in denial, because we struggled to get his amputation surgery done - only to find out that he has another cancer on top of the first one.  Neither one of us want him to suffer. 

I'm so very, very sorry. I know this is hard on the whole pack, especially with everything you've been through. I can't even imagine. I'll try to help as best as I can.

I hope you don't mind but I moved your post here since your questions are about end of life care.

First, what kind of secondary cancer is it? I'm not an oncologist but it doesn't sound like osteosarcoma to me. And how are the vets managing the cancer pain? What kinds of medications is he on? Prognoses are just best guesses really, and I hope he has way, way more time with you.

Second, as hard as it is, you and the husband must have a convo about end of life decisions. Waiting until the need is urgent is stressful, upsetting for everyone including your pup and in the end the cause of much guilt with the humans. It's not pretty so don't wait OK? I know it's SO hard. But I'd suggest calling a pawspice vet to come in as an unbiased 3rd party and discuss exactly what's going on and how you can both get on the same page about steps to keep him comfortable and have a peaceful transition. It's scary, but it can be done.

You can find a pawspice vet at the International Assn. of Animal Hospice and Palliative Care providers. They are much more adept than general practice vets at offering support during a time like this.

Sometimes it's very difficult to know when an animal's had enough. We used to think that everyone knows when it's time but truth be told animals are much better at hiding pain and discomfort than we ever thought. The reality is that we must be prepared to let them go before the pain is showing signs that it's unbearable. That's when it's too late.

I'm really, really sorry. The Tripawds Helpline is here to help anytime you need it OK? Keep us posted.

Thank you - it's very hard on all of us that love him dearly.  

Yes the osteosarcoma was in his leg and this growth that they found in the throat was another cancer but they didn't tell me exactly what cancer type it was.  In order for me to find out the exact name - i would have had to give them another $150.  

he is currently on a regime of getting his meloxicam, Gabapentin and Tramadol is the regime.  He only gets his meloxicam in the morning the rest 3 x a day.  

I know that it's something that needs to be discussed but really hard.  Because we got the amputation done thinking it was the only battle we had to worry about - now that we have another cancer to worry about.  I think that my husband doesn't want to let go and honestly - don't blame him.  We will definitely are going to try to talk this weekend about it - because I have a stupid work trip next week and will be gone the whole entire week.  Which my anxiety levels have gone up greatly over this!! My daughter told me that I shouldn't worry because Milo loves me very much and he wouldn't leave this Earth without me being there.

that is the goal to not have him suffer longer than he has.  He is such an amazing goofy oversize lovebug.

thank you for the kind words and advice.